Battling Maxo

Member for
7 years · 5 months · 7 days
Find A Grave ID
Not accepting messages.


I'm happy to add any additional information to memorials I have created; use the edit tab on the pertinent memorial to send links and/or suggestions. Please send any obits C&P-ready (properly punctuated, capitalized, etc.); I'll do any necessary paragraph breaks.

I transfer within Find A Grave guidelines; requests from "name collectors" will be rejected.

I process edits at least twice a week. I generally accept links, middle/maiden name changes without question, but generic emails suggesting changes without supporting information will be discarded and no changes will be made to the memorial.

Any pictures I add to this site I consider to be shared with whoever has an interest in them. Please feel free to use them for any non-commercial use. This permission does not extend to adding them to any other Find A Grave memorial, however.

I create memorials based on my own canvasses of cemeteries. I don't feel obligated to do a site-wide search for unknown burials/memorials in the wrong cemetery. I only check the cemetery I am adding the memorial to. Don't move your previously "burial unknown" memorial when you finally get a clue and then tell me I have a "duplicate". I've had that crap pulled before and you WILL be called out on it. Read the rules. If you can't grasp the simple concept that a memorial in the correct cemetery trumps an earlier memorial in the wrong place then maybe Find A Grave isn't for you.

I generally try to refrain from creating memorials for the recently departed unless I have some connection to them. That being said, I realize that there are other Find A Grave contributors that might have a closer connection so I hold off a while to give them that opportunity; to create a memorial before the "body is cold" is just...unseemly.
Some people are so obsessed with trying to increase their numbers that I can almost visualize them camping out in hospitals and nursing homes listening for "Code Blue" or creeping around to find some poor soul that can no longer fog up a mirror.
I know that sounds harsh, and I think everybody should have a memorial, but the worst of these serial listers have absolutely no connection to this area; they don't know the families so they don't do proper links, they're not familiar with the local cemeteries so they don't get them in the right place, etc.

If I have created a memorial for your family member simply ask for a transfer. If it's a recently deceased person and you really have your heart set on listing them but didn't have an opportunity to put them in before I did, in some cases I will delete mine after you have created an appropriate memorial.

I started doing this after an instance where my uncle passed in the evening, and I went to create a memorial for him the next morning and saw one was already in place. The contributor that created it is a distant relative to me but not to him at all, and she is very much aware that I am active on Find A Grave. I contacted her, and the message thread went like this:
Me: "You do know Xxxxx is my uncle, right?"
Her: "Yes"

So I know how it feels. Some people simply have no class.

I will do this on a case by case basis and ONLY if I am contacted beforehand and allowed a reasonable time to consider the request. I'm generally a pretty agreeable person but I detest liars, whiners, and people of the rectal orifice persuasion.

Oh, one more thing. Pictures. I try to take the best gravestone photos I can as lighting conditions allow, and I take pride in it (I have some cemeteries I've done that I intend to go re-shoot because I'm not satisfied with how they turned out). If a memorial has an acceptable quality photo in place, it's not necessary to add one that you took; in fact Find A Grave discourages this unless your photo is of substantially better quality. So please don't put your crappy sideways iPhone photo in on top of mine "just because".

You would think this would go without saying, but don't steal and Photoshop MY picture and then add it to the memorial (yes, it has happened but must of those offenders are now former contributors; when you click on a member name and it says "Record not found" chances are it's because they had trouble comprehending simple rules and etiquette). If I wanted it sepia toned I'd do that myself.

You can contact me about a specific memorial using the edit tab. For anything else, my email address is on my profile page. It goes to an email address that I check every day. Don't email my wife. Yes, that has happened too; she's a far more prolific contributor than I am and some people know who she is and have emailed her to pass me a message. It's particularly amusing when somebody that DOESN'T know we're married emails her to complain about me because I hurt their widdle feelings. I had my comments enabled for years but closed it because of the whackjob factor. You know who you are.

If it's not a published Find A Grave rule, then it isn't a rule. Go sell crazy someplace else.

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