New Find A Grave memorial transfer guidelines:
"Memorials are transferred for relatives with these close relationships: child, spouse/partner, sibling, parent, grandchild, great-grandchild, grandparent, great-grandparent, niece/nephew, great niece/nephew, aunt/uncle, great aunt/uncle, or first cousin. This would include adoptive, step, and in-law versions of these relationships. Please show sensitivity to immediate and extended family members and their requests.."

Guidelines for showing military rank for someone who did not die in the service:
10 U.S. Code § 772
(e)A person not on active duty who served honorably in time of war in the Army, Navy, Air Force, or Marine Corps may bear the title, and, when authorized by regulations prescribed by the President, wear the uniform, of the highest grade held by him during that war.

The Ancestor

Your tombstone stands among the rest;
Neglected and alone.
The name and date are chiseled out
On polished, marbled stone.
It reaches out to all who care
It is too late to mourn.
You did not know that I exist
You died and I was born.
Yet each of us are cells of you
In flesh, in blood, in bone.
Our blood contracts and beats a pulse
Entirely not our own.
Dear Ancestor, the place you filled
One hundred years ago
Spreads out among the ones you left
Who would have loved you so.
I wonder if you lived and loved,
I wonder if you knew
That someday I would find this spot,
And come to visit you.

~ Walter Butler Palmer (1906)

New Find A Grave memorial transfer guidelines:
"Memorials are transferred for relatives with these close relationships: child, spouse/partner, sibling, parent, grandchild, great-grandchild, grandparent, great-grandparent, niece/nephew, great niece/nephew, aunt/uncle, great aunt/uncle, or first cousin. This would include adoptive, step, and in-law versions of these relationships. Please show sensitivity to immediate and extended family members and their requests.."

Guidelines for showing military rank for someone who did not die in the service:
10 U.S. Code § 772
(e)A person not on active duty who served honorably in time of war in the Army, Navy, Air Force, or Marine Corps may bear the title, and, when authorized by regulations prescribed by the President, wear the uniform, of the highest grade held by him during that war.

The Ancestor

Your tombstone stands among the rest;
Neglected and alone.
The name and date are chiseled out
On polished, marbled stone.
It reaches out to all who care
It is too late to mourn.
You did not know that I exist
You died and I was born.
Yet each of us are cells of you
In flesh, in blood, in bone.
Our blood contracts and beats a pulse
Entirely not our own.
Dear Ancestor, the place you filled
One hundred years ago
Spreads out among the ones you left
Who would have loved you so.
I wonder if you lived and loved,
I wonder if you knew
That someday I would find this spot,
And come to visit you.

~ Walter Butler Palmer (1906)