Beloved first born child of Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter. Brother of Jesse VanCortlandt and Katherine Elizabeth Porter. Grandson of Cora and Fred Porter, Grace and Bruce Schlageter. Nephew of Barbara and Greg, Dan, Ann and Jay, Liz and Scott. Cousin of Greg and Jessica, James, Sam and Will.
"Andy" to his family and childhood friends (like his great-grandfather, whose birthday he shared), "Porter" to his many adulthood friends, and "Doktor P" to the podcast world. He died peacefully after a long illness, in his family home, at age 34 years.
From the last weeks his life- "You know, I'll never have any children. I really would have liked a little kid of my own."
You will find as you look back
upon your life that the moments
when you have really lived are the
moments when you have done
things in the spirit of love.
_Henry Drummond
Eulogy;
Things we all know but, may never have said, by Jesse V Porter;
Fred was born to Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter December 24th 1982 in Rochester, NY. They soon moved to Brockport where Andy grew, went to school, made a place for himself, and became the man we all know today.
Andrew loved many things - comics, super heroes, video games, magic cards, basketball, football, bicycling, pizza, coffee, beer, whiskey, intellectual conversation, jokes, and, if you knew him well, you knew he liked to get you excited and get a laugh out of it.
DoktorP loved technology. He was fortunate to be born in this age. He could always fix your computer, tell you what program to run what in, get rid of viruses, build web pages, fix hardware, run audio equipment, learn a new program over night (just to make you look bad), become an expert at video games in short order. Simple fact was, it came easy to him. He was a natural. He would see order where we saw chaos and challenges.
Andy was always the funniest person. Whether it was at your expense, or at anothers, it made you laugh. He could say some pretty out there things just to get a rise out of you and would fight to the end to justify it. He was never afraid to speak his mind. Never afraid to put pen to paper.
My best friend was a tough guy. Many may say he wasn't but they didn't carry what he did - His emotional pain and all the physical pain he collected along the way. He would complain but, never as much as he should have. Always waiting to the last minute to have someone take care of him. He was a magnet for his own suffering. I don't know anyone that could have walked that tall for that long. Andy could never accept that he was terminally ill.
My son was a happy boy. Always taking care of his siblings. Always making sure they were happy. He was a role model to them and they have looked up to him his whole life through. He challenged them to beat him. He made sure the bar was high. Simply put he made people better and he didn't try to do it. Like many of my son's talents, it came easy to him.
My Brother always watched out for me. Never let me be alone. Checked on me. Included me. Made sure that I had what I wanted at his expense. I didn't know anyone that didn't want to be like my brother. Growing up, if he didn't say it was cool, it wasn't...
His approval was everything.
The big man always made friends everywhere he went. If you live in this town, you know he was a staple that held it together. Townie is the word that some might use, Brockport patriot is was I prefer. Supporting and promoting local businesses through social media, web pages, his pod casts, and simply by being himself.
If King Frederick didn't insult you, call you out, make fun of what just fell out of your mouth or off your keyboard onto Facebook, laugh at you, grumble in your direction, throw you a stupid face, poke you, hug you, make you feel uncomfortable; I feel bad for you. You missed the things that made him exceptional.
Lo there do I see my father;
Lo there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers;
Lo there do I see the line of my people,
back to the beginning.
Lo,
they do call me,
they bid me take my place among them,
in the halls of Valhalla,
where the brave
may live
forever.
"Porter's" Facebook message about his funeral;
Quit crying and blubbering. I don't like adult babies. Don't morn me. Remember our good times and the memories we shared. The laughs will ring on. Drink a heavy dark beer for me. None of those pussy Blue Lattes. Share some whiskey and smile. Know that if I talked shit or harassed you it's because I care. It has been hard for me for the last number of years. I knew my time was coming and I wanted to leave on my terms where I was safe, comfortable, happy, and loved. It was going to happen today or not long off in the future. You can try to forget me but, just when you do, know that I'll be telling you to "Go f**k your self."
Please join me for one more adventure. An epic quest to end all suffering. I'm going to need you all. I'm calling a gathering at Fowler's Funeral Home, 340 West Ave, Brockport, NY 14420 from 1:00 pm until 4:00 pm on Saturday January 28th for the first leg of the journey. We will pack our bags, take inventory of our weapons and supplies, and prepare ourselves for battle one last time.
The next stop will be the great hall at The Stoneyard Breakfast Company, 26 Clinton St, Brockport, NY 14420 from 5:00 pm to 8:00 pm, January 28th. Expect epic poems, merriment, food, libations, and shenanigans. The people joining on this quest will serve as our hearth and their hearts our roaring funeral pyre. Keep your feels at home but, if you have to, please be sad with with my people, my family, and my fellow cosmonauts who make up this fellowship.
We will venture together to C&S Saloon, 34 Main St S, Brockport, NY 14420 until they toss us out or close. No good epic ends without a celebrations but, then again, this epic won't have an ending. I send you forth from here to "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women!" I'll be waiting for you to join me in my hall when your final battle meets you and will greet you with open arms.
I send you off with all my heart can give. I'll be with you, you'll see me. That flash image in the mirror. That big shadow behind you. That quick glance out of the corner of your eye. When you get a hug from a man as mountainous as I. When you play a video game. When you watch a shit movie. Or when you feel guilty for liking a good movie that you know I would hate you for you liking. When you sit in my seat. When you try to be politically correct... tell ya what, just don't be politically correct. When you're alone, just know I'm there. I really am and always have been.
Best regards,
Fred, Frederick A. Porter III, Andy, Andrew, Porter, Pookie, Big Man, Son, Brother, A Right Good Bastard, Our Asshole, Mungha, Pandy, Your Best Friend, DoktorP, The Mayor of Brockport, King Frederick...............
Burial Speech, 20 July, 2017, from his brother Jesse,
FRED
Thank you all for coming. Thank you for the huge amount of support you all have shown each other, my brother, and my family.
We all know Fred wasn't a religious guy but, he had his own beliefs. He believed in humanity. That they could do right, once in a while but, most importantly he believed they would provide him hours of easy jokes and the joy of criticizing them. All with a smile of course ��
Andy believed in the people in his life. Always there to laugh at his wit and always there to pick him up when he was down. Even if he didn't give you the satisfaction of knowing you had been successful.
My brother believed in a good drink at the end of a long or rotten day. ("Or a good day, too!"-Kit Schlageter)I know we have all shared a cocktail or a beer with him and most often felt better when it was through.
The big guy believed in taking care of his friends and family. Sometimes in strange ways but, not one of us here can say he didn't make each of our lives richer, better, and bigger than they were before.
Porter believed in impossible trials and Fantasy. Heroes, villains, and anti-heroes. He tended to play a little of each when the situation permitted.
Fred believed that being frank and talking trash were necessary to know himself and to truly know the people around him. Always quick with a joke at his expense or at yours.
Mostly I think he believed in his friends and family. I for one have always been amazed at how, when you least expect it, he could be so selfless. He wouldn't do that if he didn't believe.
I'd like to believe, but, more than that, I hope he is well. I hope I will see him again face to face. Pictures and dreams fall short compared to the rich memories and stories we all have.
With that, we asked you all here to help us put Fred in his final place on this earth because he believed in all of you more than anything else, in this world or the next.
Thank you for sharing your time with us. Thank you for showing the impact he had on us and on our world.
.......................................
Frederick's ancestors first set foot in Virginia in 1609, the voyage was the inspiration for Shakespeare's "Tempest". He was the direct descendant of Mayflower Passengers Edward Doty, Francis Cooke, Stephen and Elizabeth Fisher Hopkins, and at least 20 Revolutionary War soldiers, both Patriot and Loyalist. He was the first cousin, many times removed, of President John Adams. He was a collateral descendant of the Plantagenets. His G-Great grandparents were born in Wollin, Prussia which Ahmad ibn Fadlan, ambassador from the Caliph of Baghdad to the Volga Vikings, visited in 921- the city where Beowulf was set.
Brother
There is a place
I recognize as Yours
Memory can't fill-
A Forever- Nothing,
A Never- Something,
A picture of a field,
where once a house stood,
now lays
Frozen
K E Porter
26 January, 2017
"Andy" to his family and childhood friends (like his great-grandfather, whose birthday he shared), "Porter" to his many adulthood friends, and "Doktor P" to the podcast world. He died peacefully after a long illness, in his family home, at age 34 years.
From the last weeks his life- "You know, I'll never have any children. I really would have liked a little kid of my own."
You will find as you look back
upon your life that the moments
when you have really lived are the
moments when you have done
things in the spirit of love.
_Henry Drummond
Eulogy;
Things we all know but, may never have said, by Jesse V Porter;
Fred was born to Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter December 24th 1982 in Rochester, NY. They soon moved to Brockport where Andy grew, went to school, made a place for himself, and became the man we all know today.
Andrew loved many things - comics, super heroes, video games, magic cards, basketball, football, bicycling, pizza, coffee, beer, whiskey, intellectual conversation, jokes, and, if you knew him well, you knew he liked to get you excited and get a laugh out of it.
DoktorP loved technology. He was fortunate to be born in this age. He could always fix your computer, tell you what program to run what in, get rid of viruses, build web pages, fix hardware, run audio equipment, learn a new program over night (just to make you look bad), become an expert at video games in short order. Simple fact was, it came easy to him. He was a natural. He would see order where we saw chaos and challenges.
Andy was always the funniest person. Whether it was at your expense, or at anothers, it made you laugh. He could say some pretty out there things just to get a rise out of you and would fight to the end to justify it. He was never afraid to speak his mind. Never afraid to put pen to paper.
My best friend was a tough guy. Many may say he wasn't but they didn't carry what he did - His emotional pain and all the physical pain he collected along the way. He would complain but, never as much as he should have. Always waiting to the last minute to have someone take care of him. He was a magnet for his own suffering. I don't know anyone that could have walked that tall for that long. Andy could never accept that he was terminally ill.
My son was a happy boy. Always taking care of his siblings. Always making sure they were happy. He was a role model to them and they have looked up to him his whole life through. He challenged them to beat him. He made sure the bar was high. Simply put he made people better and he didn't try to do it. Like many of my son's talents, it came easy to him.
My Brother always watched out for me. Never let me be alone. Checked on me. Included me. Made sure that I had what I wanted at his expense. I didn't know anyone that didn't want to be like my brother. Growing up, if he didn't say it was cool, it wasn't...
His approval was everything.
The big man always made friends everywhere he went. If you live in this town, you know he was a staple that held it together. Townie is the word that some might use, Brockport patriot is was I prefer. Supporting and promoting local businesses through social media, web pages, his pod casts, and simply by being himself.
If King Frederick didn't insult you, call you out, make fun of what just fell out of your mouth or off your keyboard onto Facebook, laugh at you, grumble in your direction, throw you a stupid face, poke you, hug you, make you feel uncomfortable; I feel bad for you. You missed the things that made him exceptional.
Lo there do I see my father;
Lo there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers;
Lo there do I see the line of my people,
back to the beginning.
Lo,
they do call me,
they bid me take my place among them,
in the halls of Valhalla,
where the brave
may live
forever.
"Porter's" Facebook message about his funeral;
Quit crying and blubbering. I don't like adult babies. Don't morn me. Remember our good times and the memories we shared. The laughs will ring on. Drink a heavy dark beer for me. None of those pussy Blue Lattes. Share some whiskey and smile. Know that if I talked shit or harassed you it's because I care. It has been hard for me for the last number of years. I knew my time was coming and I wanted to leave on my terms where I was safe, comfortable, happy, and loved. It was going to happen today or not long off in the future. You can try to forget me but, just when you do, know that I'll be telling you to "Go f**k your self."
Please join me for one more adventure. An epic quest to end all suffering. I'm going to need you all. I'm calling a gathering at Fowler's Funeral Home, 340 West Ave, Brockport, NY 14420 from 1:00 pm until 4:00 pm on Saturday January 28th for the first leg of the journey. We will pack our bags, take inventory of our weapons and supplies, and prepare ourselves for battle one last time.
The next stop will be the great hall at The Stoneyard Breakfast Company, 26 Clinton St, Brockport, NY 14420 from 5:00 pm to 8:00 pm, January 28th. Expect epic poems, merriment, food, libations, and shenanigans. The people joining on this quest will serve as our hearth and their hearts our roaring funeral pyre. Keep your feels at home but, if you have to, please be sad with with my people, my family, and my fellow cosmonauts who make up this fellowship.
We will venture together to C&S Saloon, 34 Main St S, Brockport, NY 14420 until they toss us out or close. No good epic ends without a celebrations but, then again, this epic won't have an ending. I send you forth from here to "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women!" I'll be waiting for you to join me in my hall when your final battle meets you and will greet you with open arms.
I send you off with all my heart can give. I'll be with you, you'll see me. That flash image in the mirror. That big shadow behind you. That quick glance out of the corner of your eye. When you get a hug from a man as mountainous as I. When you play a video game. When you watch a shit movie. Or when you feel guilty for liking a good movie that you know I would hate you for you liking. When you sit in my seat. When you try to be politically correct... tell ya what, just don't be politically correct. When you're alone, just know I'm there. I really am and always have been.
Best regards,
Fred, Frederick A. Porter III, Andy, Andrew, Porter, Pookie, Big Man, Son, Brother, A Right Good Bastard, Our Asshole, Mungha, Pandy, Your Best Friend, DoktorP, The Mayor of Brockport, King Frederick...............
Burial Speech, 20 July, 2017, from his brother Jesse,
FRED
Thank you all for coming. Thank you for the huge amount of support you all have shown each other, my brother, and my family.
We all know Fred wasn't a religious guy but, he had his own beliefs. He believed in humanity. That they could do right, once in a while but, most importantly he believed they would provide him hours of easy jokes and the joy of criticizing them. All with a smile of course ��
Andy believed in the people in his life. Always there to laugh at his wit and always there to pick him up when he was down. Even if he didn't give you the satisfaction of knowing you had been successful.
My brother believed in a good drink at the end of a long or rotten day. ("Or a good day, too!"-Kit Schlageter)I know we have all shared a cocktail or a beer with him and most often felt better when it was through.
The big guy believed in taking care of his friends and family. Sometimes in strange ways but, not one of us here can say he didn't make each of our lives richer, better, and bigger than they were before.
Porter believed in impossible trials and Fantasy. Heroes, villains, and anti-heroes. He tended to play a little of each when the situation permitted.
Fred believed that being frank and talking trash were necessary to know himself and to truly know the people around him. Always quick with a joke at his expense or at yours.
Mostly I think he believed in his friends and family. I for one have always been amazed at how, when you least expect it, he could be so selfless. He wouldn't do that if he didn't believe.
I'd like to believe, but, more than that, I hope he is well. I hope I will see him again face to face. Pictures and dreams fall short compared to the rich memories and stories we all have.
With that, we asked you all here to help us put Fred in his final place on this earth because he believed in all of you more than anything else, in this world or the next.
Thank you for sharing your time with us. Thank you for showing the impact he had on us and on our world.
.......................................
Frederick's ancestors first set foot in Virginia in 1609, the voyage was the inspiration for Shakespeare's "Tempest". He was the direct descendant of Mayflower Passengers Edward Doty, Francis Cooke, Stephen and Elizabeth Fisher Hopkins, and at least 20 Revolutionary War soldiers, both Patriot and Loyalist. He was the first cousin, many times removed, of President John Adams. He was a collateral descendant of the Plantagenets. His G-Great grandparents were born in Wollin, Prussia which Ahmad ibn Fadlan, ambassador from the Caliph of Baghdad to the Volga Vikings, visited in 921- the city where Beowulf was set.
Brother
There is a place
I recognize as Yours
Memory can't fill-
A Forever- Nothing,
A Never- Something,
A picture of a field,
where once a house stood,
now lays
Frozen
K E Porter
26 January, 2017
Beloved first born child of Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter. Brother of Jesse VanCortlandt and Katherine Elizabeth Porter. Grandson of Cora and Fred Porter, Grace and Bruce Schlageter. Nephew of Barbara and Greg, Dan, Ann and Jay, Liz and Scott. Cousin of Greg and Jessica, James, Sam and Will.
"Andy" to his family and childhood friends (like his great-grandfather, whose birthday he shared), "Porter" to his many adulthood friends, and "Doktor P" to the podcast world. He died peacefully after a long illness, in his family home, at age 34 years.
From the last weeks his life- "You know, I'll never have any children. I really would have liked a little kid of my own."
You will find as you look back
upon your life that the moments
when you have really lived are the
moments when you have done
things in the spirit of love.
_Henry Drummond
Eulogy;
Things we all know but, may never have said, by Jesse V Porter;
Fred was born to Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter December 24th 1982 in Rochester, NY. They soon moved to Brockport where Andy grew, went to school, made a place for himself, and became the man we all know today.
Andrew loved many things - comics, super heroes, video games, magic cards, basketball, football, bicycling, pizza, coffee, beer, whiskey, intellectual conversation, jokes, and, if you knew him well, you knew he liked to get you excited and get a laugh out of it.
DoktorP loved technology. He was fortunate to be born in this age. He could always fix your computer, tell you what program to run what in, get rid of viruses, build web pages, fix hardware, run audio equipment, learn a new program over night (just to make you look bad), become an expert at video games in short order. Simple fact was, it came easy to him. He was a natural. He would see order where we saw chaos and challenges.
Andy was always the funniest person. Whether it was at your expense, or at anothers, it made you laugh. He could say some pretty out there things just to get a rise out of you and would fight to the end to justify it. He was never afraid to speak his mind. Never afraid to put pen to paper.
My best friend was a tough guy. Many may say he wasn't but they didn't carry what he did - His emotional pain and all the physical pain he collected along the way. He would complain but, never as much as he should have. Always waiting to the last minute to have someone take care of him. He was a magnet for his own suffering. I don't know anyone that could have walked that tall for that long. Andy could never accept that he was terminally ill.
My son was a happy boy. Always taking care of his siblings. Always making sure they were happy. He was a role model to them and they have looked up to him his whole life through. He challenged them to beat him. He made sure the bar was high. Simply put he made people better and he didn't try to do it. Like many of my son's talents, it came easy to him.
My Brother always watched out for me. Never let me be alone. Checked on me. Included me. Made sure that I had what I wanted at his expense. I didn't know anyone that didn't want to be like my brother. Growing up, if he didn't say it was cool, it wasn't...
His approval was everything.
The big man always made friends everywhere he went. If you live in this town, you know he was a staple that held it together. Townie is the word that some might use, Brockport patriot is was I prefer. Supporting and promoting local businesses through social media, web pages, his pod casts, and simply by being himself.
If King Frederick didn't insult you, call you out, make fun of what just fell out of your mouth or off your keyboard onto Facebook, laugh at you, grumble in your direction, throw you a stupid face, poke you, hug you, make you feel uncomfortable; I feel bad for you. You missed the things that made him exceptional.
Lo there do I see my father;
Lo there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers;
Lo there do I see the line of my people,
back to the beginning.
Lo,
they do call me,
they bid me take my place among them,
in the halls of Valhalla,
where the brave
may live
forever.
"Porter's" Facebook message about his funeral;
Quit crying and blubbering. I don't like adult babies. Don't morn me. Remember our good times and the memories we shared. The laughs will ring on. Drink a heavy dark beer for me. None of those pussy Blue Lattes. Share some whiskey and smile. Know that if I talked shit or harassed you it's because I care. It has been hard for me for the last number of years. I knew my time was coming and I wanted to leave on my terms where I was safe, comfortable, happy, and loved. It was going to happen today or not long off in the future. You can try to forget me but, just when you do, know that I'll be telling you to "Go f**k your self."
Please join me for one more adventure. An epic quest to end all suffering. I'm going to need you all. I'm calling a gathering at Fowler's Funeral Home, 340 West Ave, Brockport, NY 14420 from 1:00 pm until 4:00 pm on Saturday January 28th for the first leg of the journey. We will pack our bags, take inventory of our weapons and supplies, and prepare ourselves for battle one last time.
The next stop will be the great hall at The Stoneyard Breakfast Company, 26 Clinton St, Brockport, NY 14420 from 5:00 pm to 8:00 pm, January 28th. Expect epic poems, merriment, food, libations, and shenanigans. The people joining on this quest will serve as our hearth and their hearts our roaring funeral pyre. Keep your feels at home but, if you have to, please be sad with with my people, my family, and my fellow cosmonauts who make up this fellowship.
We will venture together to C&S Saloon, 34 Main St S, Brockport, NY 14420 until they toss us out or close. No good epic ends without a celebrations but, then again, this epic won't have an ending. I send you forth from here to "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women!" I'll be waiting for you to join me in my hall when your final battle meets you and will greet you with open arms.
I send you off with all my heart can give. I'll be with you, you'll see me. That flash image in the mirror. That big shadow behind you. That quick glance out of the corner of your eye. When you get a hug from a man as mountainous as I. When you play a video game. When you watch a shit movie. Or when you feel guilty for liking a good movie that you know I would hate you for you liking. When you sit in my seat. When you try to be politically correct... tell ya what, just don't be politically correct. When you're alone, just know I'm there. I really am and always have been.
Best regards,
Fred, Frederick A. Porter III, Andy, Andrew, Porter, Pookie, Big Man, Son, Brother, A Right Good Bastard, Our Asshole, Mungha, Pandy, Your Best Friend, DoktorP, The Mayor of Brockport, King Frederick...............
Burial Speech, 20 July, 2017, from his brother Jesse,
FRED
Thank you all for coming. Thank you for the huge amount of support you all have shown each other, my brother, and my family.
We all know Fred wasn't a religious guy but, he had his own beliefs. He believed in humanity. That they could do right, once in a while but, most importantly he believed they would provide him hours of easy jokes and the joy of criticizing them. All with a smile of course ��
Andy believed in the people in his life. Always there to laugh at his wit and always there to pick him up when he was down. Even if he didn't give you the satisfaction of knowing you had been successful.
My brother believed in a good drink at the end of a long or rotten day. ("Or a good day, too!"-Kit Schlageter)I know we have all shared a cocktail or a beer with him and most often felt better when it was through.
The big guy believed in taking care of his friends and family. Sometimes in strange ways but, not one of us here can say he didn't make each of our lives richer, better, and bigger than they were before.
Porter believed in impossible trials and Fantasy. Heroes, villains, and anti-heroes. He tended to play a little of each when the situation permitted.
Fred believed that being frank and talking trash were necessary to know himself and to truly know the people around him. Always quick with a joke at his expense or at yours.
Mostly I think he believed in his friends and family. I for one have always been amazed at how, when you least expect it, he could be so selfless. He wouldn't do that if he didn't believe.
I'd like to believe, but, more than that, I hope he is well. I hope I will see him again face to face. Pictures and dreams fall short compared to the rich memories and stories we all have.
With that, we asked you all here to help us put Fred in his final place on this earth because he believed in all of you more than anything else, in this world or the next.
Thank you for sharing your time with us. Thank you for showing the impact he had on us and on our world.
.......................................
Frederick's ancestors first set foot in Virginia in 1609, the voyage was the inspiration for Shakespeare's "Tempest". He was the direct descendant of Mayflower Passengers Edward Doty, Francis Cooke, Stephen and Elizabeth Fisher Hopkins, and at least 20 Revolutionary War soldiers, both Patriot and Loyalist. He was the first cousin, many times removed, of President John Adams. He was a collateral descendant of the Plantagenets. His G-Great grandparents were born in Wollin, Prussia which Ahmad ibn Fadlan, ambassador from the Caliph of Baghdad to the Volga Vikings, visited in 921- the city where Beowulf was set.
Brother
There is a place
I recognize as Yours
Memory can't fill-
A Forever- Nothing,
A Never- Something,
A picture of a field,
where once a house stood,
now lays
Frozen
K E Porter
26 January, 2017
"Andy" to his family and childhood friends (like his great-grandfather, whose birthday he shared), "Porter" to his many adulthood friends, and "Doktor P" to the podcast world. He died peacefully after a long illness, in his family home, at age 34 years.
From the last weeks his life- "You know, I'll never have any children. I really would have liked a little kid of my own."
You will find as you look back
upon your life that the moments
when you have really lived are the
moments when you have done
things in the spirit of love.
_Henry Drummond
Eulogy;
Things we all know but, may never have said, by Jesse V Porter;
Fred was born to Kit Schlageter and Fred Porter December 24th 1982 in Rochester, NY. They soon moved to Brockport where Andy grew, went to school, made a place for himself, and became the man we all know today.
Andrew loved many things - comics, super heroes, video games, magic cards, basketball, football, bicycling, pizza, coffee, beer, whiskey, intellectual conversation, jokes, and, if you knew him well, you knew he liked to get you excited and get a laugh out of it.
DoktorP loved technology. He was fortunate to be born in this age. He could always fix your computer, tell you what program to run what in, get rid of viruses, build web pages, fix hardware, run audio equipment, learn a new program over night (just to make you look bad), become an expert at video games in short order. Simple fact was, it came easy to him. He was a natural. He would see order where we saw chaos and challenges.
Andy was always the funniest person. Whether it was at your expense, or at anothers, it made you laugh. He could say some pretty out there things just to get a rise out of you and would fight to the end to justify it. He was never afraid to speak his mind. Never afraid to put pen to paper.
My best friend was a tough guy. Many may say he wasn't but they didn't carry what he did - His emotional pain and all the physical pain he collected along the way. He would complain but, never as much as he should have. Always waiting to the last minute to have someone take care of him. He was a magnet for his own suffering. I don't know anyone that could have walked that tall for that long. Andy could never accept that he was terminally ill.
My son was a happy boy. Always taking care of his siblings. Always making sure they were happy. He was a role model to them and they have looked up to him his whole life through. He challenged them to beat him. He made sure the bar was high. Simply put he made people better and he didn't try to do it. Like many of my son's talents, it came easy to him.
My Brother always watched out for me. Never let me be alone. Checked on me. Included me. Made sure that I had what I wanted at his expense. I didn't know anyone that didn't want to be like my brother. Growing up, if he didn't say it was cool, it wasn't...
His approval was everything.
The big man always made friends everywhere he went. If you live in this town, you know he was a staple that held it together. Townie is the word that some might use, Brockport patriot is was I prefer. Supporting and promoting local businesses through social media, web pages, his pod casts, and simply by being himself.
If King Frederick didn't insult you, call you out, make fun of what just fell out of your mouth or off your keyboard onto Facebook, laugh at you, grumble in your direction, throw you a stupid face, poke you, hug you, make you feel uncomfortable; I feel bad for you. You missed the things that made him exceptional.
Lo there do I see my father;
Lo there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers;
Lo there do I see the line of my people,
back to the beginning.
Lo,
they do call me,
they bid me take my place among them,
in the halls of Valhalla,
where the brave
may live
forever.
"Porter's" Facebook message about his funeral;
Quit crying and blubbering. I don't like adult babies. Don't morn me. Remember our good times and the memories we shared. The laughs will ring on. Drink a heavy dark beer for me. None of those pussy Blue Lattes. Share some whiskey and smile. Know that if I talked shit or harassed you it's because I care. It has been hard for me for the last number of years. I knew my time was coming and I wanted to leave on my terms where I was safe, comfortable, happy, and loved. It was going to happen today or not long off in the future. You can try to forget me but, just when you do, know that I'll be telling you to "Go f**k your self."
Please join me for one more adventure. An epic quest to end all suffering. I'm going to need you all. I'm calling a gathering at Fowler's Funeral Home, 340 West Ave, Brockport, NY 14420 from 1:00 pm until 4:00 pm on Saturday January 28th for the first leg of the journey. We will pack our bags, take inventory of our weapons and supplies, and prepare ourselves for battle one last time.
The next stop will be the great hall at The Stoneyard Breakfast Company, 26 Clinton St, Brockport, NY 14420 from 5:00 pm to 8:00 pm, January 28th. Expect epic poems, merriment, food, libations, and shenanigans. The people joining on this quest will serve as our hearth and their hearts our roaring funeral pyre. Keep your feels at home but, if you have to, please be sad with with my people, my family, and my fellow cosmonauts who make up this fellowship.
We will venture together to C&S Saloon, 34 Main St S, Brockport, NY 14420 until they toss us out or close. No good epic ends without a celebrations but, then again, this epic won't have an ending. I send you forth from here to "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women!" I'll be waiting for you to join me in my hall when your final battle meets you and will greet you with open arms.
I send you off with all my heart can give. I'll be with you, you'll see me. That flash image in the mirror. That big shadow behind you. That quick glance out of the corner of your eye. When you get a hug from a man as mountainous as I. When you play a video game. When you watch a shit movie. Or when you feel guilty for liking a good movie that you know I would hate you for you liking. When you sit in my seat. When you try to be politically correct... tell ya what, just don't be politically correct. When you're alone, just know I'm there. I really am and always have been.
Best regards,
Fred, Frederick A. Porter III, Andy, Andrew, Porter, Pookie, Big Man, Son, Brother, A Right Good Bastard, Our Asshole, Mungha, Pandy, Your Best Friend, DoktorP, The Mayor of Brockport, King Frederick...............
Burial Speech, 20 July, 2017, from his brother Jesse,
FRED
Thank you all for coming. Thank you for the huge amount of support you all have shown each other, my brother, and my family.
We all know Fred wasn't a religious guy but, he had his own beliefs. He believed in humanity. That they could do right, once in a while but, most importantly he believed they would provide him hours of easy jokes and the joy of criticizing them. All with a smile of course ��
Andy believed in the people in his life. Always there to laugh at his wit and always there to pick him up when he was down. Even if he didn't give you the satisfaction of knowing you had been successful.
My brother believed in a good drink at the end of a long or rotten day. ("Or a good day, too!"-Kit Schlageter)I know we have all shared a cocktail or a beer with him and most often felt better when it was through.
The big guy believed in taking care of his friends and family. Sometimes in strange ways but, not one of us here can say he didn't make each of our lives richer, better, and bigger than they were before.
Porter believed in impossible trials and Fantasy. Heroes, villains, and anti-heroes. He tended to play a little of each when the situation permitted.
Fred believed that being frank and talking trash were necessary to know himself and to truly know the people around him. Always quick with a joke at his expense or at yours.
Mostly I think he believed in his friends and family. I for one have always been amazed at how, when you least expect it, he could be so selfless. He wouldn't do that if he didn't believe.
I'd like to believe, but, more than that, I hope he is well. I hope I will see him again face to face. Pictures and dreams fall short compared to the rich memories and stories we all have.
With that, we asked you all here to help us put Fred in his final place on this earth because he believed in all of you more than anything else, in this world or the next.
Thank you for sharing your time with us. Thank you for showing the impact he had on us and on our world.
.......................................
Frederick's ancestors first set foot in Virginia in 1609, the voyage was the inspiration for Shakespeare's "Tempest". He was the direct descendant of Mayflower Passengers Edward Doty, Francis Cooke, Stephen and Elizabeth Fisher Hopkins, and at least 20 Revolutionary War soldiers, both Patriot and Loyalist. He was the first cousin, many times removed, of President John Adams. He was a collateral descendant of the Plantagenets. His G-Great grandparents were born in Wollin, Prussia which Ahmad ibn Fadlan, ambassador from the Caliph of Baghdad to the Volga Vikings, visited in 921- the city where Beowulf was set.
Brother
There is a place
I recognize as Yours
Memory can't fill-
A Forever- Nothing,
A Never- Something,
A picture of a field,
where once a house stood,
now lays
Frozen
K E Porter
26 January, 2017
