Joseph Robert Medford (who mainly went by the name Robert, or J.R.) has certainly been an elusive ancestor, especially if you are descended through his first wife Mary Catherine Evans. This is because although notified of his death, Robert had in fact taken a new wife. He became a BIGAMIST.
I had put the majority of the following information under the Memorial of his first wife, Mary Catherine Evans. However, based on questions I've received, people are not seeing it. So I'm placing this on the Memorials of both Robert and Mary Catherine, since it involves both of them.
Mary Catherine Evans died after 1900, never knowing that her husband was still living … at least up to 1905. We don't really know when she died, but it was apparently before North Carolina began keeping State Death Certificates. Mary Catherine was originally interred in the Frank Edmondson Cemetery in Oak City, Martin County, North Carolina. According to her great-granddaughter, she was later exhumed and buried in the Trinity Episcopal Cemetery, Scotland Neck, Halifax, North Carolina by her son-in-law, Charles Daniel Brown.
Mary Catherine Evans is the daughter of Seth Evans and Marina (Rina/Rena) Hyman. She was one of five documented children. She and JOSEPH ROBERT MEDFORD were married just prior to 1870 in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had the following daughters:
1. Lula Timphany Medford (Memorial 69753873), born 13 October 1870 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 3 January 1902 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Mack Henry Warren on 3 February 1885 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. They had nine documented children.
2. Ida Elizabeth Medford (Memorial 67580310), born 25 January 1873 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 8 February 1966 in Portsmouth, Virginia. She married Charles Daniel Brown on 25 February 1896 in Goose Nest, Martin, North Carolina. They had seven documented children.
3. Carrie Medford, b: November 1877 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Robert L. Williford on 25 May 1898 in Tarboro, Edgecombe, North Carolina. Carrie and her husband have been difficult to locate after 1900. It doesn't appear they had children.
When researching your family tree one should remember the wise council of Val Greenwood, genealogical author and lecturer, in that our first responsibility is to the truth. In relation to Joseph Robert Medford the truth has been embraced... despite it being painful for his first family.
I am writing this for one of Joseph Robert Medford's descendants through is wife, Mary Catherine Evans. She is allowing me to include the letter written by Joseph Robert Medford to the family shortly before they were informed of his death, just prior to 1880.
PLEASE … Many people don't take the time to document, I am therefore asking that if this letter and/or story and research are used by anyone, then to please give credit to Miriam Kathleen Syme and OutOfMyTree (FAG 46880244). This letter has been in Miriam's possession since her mother died in 1980. Joseph Robert Medford is her great-grandfather and Mary Catherine Evans is her great-grandmother. It wasn't until we began researching her family that it was discovered that Joseph Robert Medford had actually deserted the family rather than having died. He became a BIGIMAST.
The letter has been more than valuable in piecing the events together. When Miriam first gave me the letter to read I have to admit that I was happy that his wife and daughters had this letter to hold and read over the years since they no longer had their husband and father. However, when it became clear that he didn't die I was able to see the letter in a different light. I now believe the letter makes it clear about the guilt Joseph Robert Medford was experiencing as he planned on making a permanent break with Mary Catherine and their children. I think it is evident that he loved his children, but he was at a point where he had to make a decision. It is pretty obvious there was not enough money to support two families.
How was it determined that Joseph Robert Medford didn't die? Well, basically it is just following through. Obviously, we cannot document every event in our ancestor's lives, but when it is an ancestor we should make every attempt to document their deaths as well as their births. So, I took the letter and tried to walk the same journey he did. His occupation was a great help in this. I was saddened when I found him living with a new family in 1880 … and of course I had to shift gears to try and find out the rest of his story.
Sometimes I've wondered if I should have told Miriam the truth about her great-grandfather. She has great love for him and would hold and caress the letter the same way I'm sure that her grandmother did. I do exactly the same when holding a love letter from my grandfather to my grandmother. It is an important connection that you can feel.
Miriam was sad to learn the truth, but to her credit she immediately forgave him and asked me to ensure that I identified all of his descendants, because she wanted to embrace them as members of her extended family. Everything about Miriam is pure class!
So, Joseph Robert Medford (herein called J. R.) had four documented relationships:
1. J. R. was first married to MARY CATHERINE EVANS (Memorial 178921593) in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had three daughters between 1870 and 1877. Mary suffered from debilitating arthritis and money was tight. The decision was therefore made for J. R. to obtain employment at the Saw Mill in Jones County, North Carolina. This job was to enable J. R. to earn more money. Until recently it was thought he had died prior to 1880. This is based on a letter the family received in 1878, followed by notification that he had died while working approximately 40 miles from Goldsboro where he was running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on the North Trent River in Jones County.
I will eventually scan the original letter and post it herein. Until then, here is the transcription. It was difficult to read and I've done my best:
-------------------- START --------------------
LETTER FROM J. R. MEDFORD TO HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN:
Nov 4th, 1878
To My
Dear little children that ______ me well but not well satisfied. I would be satisfied if you was with me. I want to see you very bad… so much so it makes me almost sick when I do study about you. Dear little babes I am at work for you. I am getting a good paid. I would send you some money now but I haven't got none now. I shall get some when my month is out and if I can't come I will send you some money then. If you are with your folk be good children until I do come. I will come after you just as soon as I can. I am about one hundred sixty miles from you and my work is so as I can't come when I do want to.
Page 2
I am running a long saw mill and my attention is called here all of the time. I wan you to come and stay with me a while. Little babe … unreadable … get some lady to wright you a letter and send to your papa for _____ want to hear from his little children being bad. Darling little babes I am a living about forty miles from Goldsboro in the north Trent River. There is no post office that is near me. So we have a lumber barg that goes up ... unreadable... So when you write me send your letter to Goldsboro and I will get it from there. There is no white people a _____ about hear only one white hand tat work at ____ mill. I am a farming … unreadable. I do get a plenty of meat and bread and flower [and] coffee to eat. I do want to stay hear until
Page 3
Christmas if nothing happens. Tell all of your folk howdy for me and tell them to take care of my little children until I do come and I will pay them well for it. I am feeling lone today. It's Sunday and I am a stranger hear. I have just been hear two weeks dear Darling little children. Write to your papa soon as you can and let me hear from you. I do want to see you more than bad. When I do come I am going to bring both of you a new dress a peace. Be good children. Nothing more… I will close by saying I remain your affectionate father until death.
J. R. Medford
To his darling little children… Lula, Ida and Carrie
Note written sideways at top of Page 1…
Do the best you can until I can send you some money _____. If I do come I can't stay but a little while.
Opposite of Page 1
Mary, I am well and doing very well. I am running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on North Trent River forty five miles from Goldsboro in Jones County. Take care of my children until I do come. I would send you some money but I haven't got it now, but I will have some in about ten or fifteen days and then I am going to send you and the children some. I want you to trust me. Just as soon as you do get this letter and let me know were all of my thing is … and how you all is getting a long. I want to stay here until Christmas before I do move you up hear. I want to see my children bad. I am a making some money. I have been hear about eight days. I can't get no money until I do work a month out. J. R. Medford
Note written sideways at top…
Git some lady who understand riting to wit your letter and have it backed to Goldsboro, NC. Kiss my little children for me. God bless them for I do want to see them.
-------------------- END --------------------
Mary Catherine, her children, and descendants have cherished this letter since 1878 never knowing that J. R. Medford had not died, but had in-fact deserted his first family and started a new family. The first clue was located while seeking documentation of his death when he was located alive and well on the 1880 census enumeration where it was evident he had a new family. He was enumerated as 40 years old and his occupation is identified as "Sawyer in Saw Mill". His place of birth is incorrectly identified as Connecticut, presumably out of guilt and the desire to mislead people.
2. J. R.'s second relationship was with LAURA N. BUNTING (Memorial 151960563) of Edgecombe County. Based on the birth year of their first child in 1875 this relationship began while both were living in Edgecombe County. It is doubtful they were officially married. J. R. and Laura also had three daughters, born between 1875 and 1882.
1. Martha Medford, b: abt 1875. (Note: This child may not actually be the daughter of J. R. However, both J. R. and Laura were both living in Edgecombe County at the same time. We don't know exactly when their relationship began. So far I have not been able to find any additional information about her.)
2. Daisy Florence Medford, (Memorial 175102687), b. 17 August 1879 in Goldsboro, Wayne, North Carolina, and d. on 1 May 1967 in Norfolk, Virginia. She married Zacchaeus Taylor Fulcher, (Memorial 175095835), who was born on 10 March 1880 in Cape Hatteras, Dare, North Carolina, and died on 19 May 1950 in Norfolk, Norfolk, Virginia.
3. Lillie M. Medford, (Memorial 151959830), b. 1882 in North Carolina, and died on 8 November 1892 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina.
Sometime after 1880, J. R. and Laura relocated to New Bern, Craven, North Carolina where Laura died on October 31, 1891. Her death notice was located in The Daily Journal (New Bern, NC) on Saturday, October 3, 1891, Page 1. There are a couple of others, as brief as this one. None identify any family members. This is the one attached to her record as a source, as follows:
"DIED -- Thursday evening Oct. 1st, Mrs. Laura N. Medford. The funeral services will be held at her late residence this morning at 9 o'clock on East Front Street, three doors from the corner of Pollock street. The friends and acquaintance of the family are invited to attend." Citation: www.NewsPapers.com, Saturday, October 3, 1891, The Daily Journal (New Bern, North Carolina), Page 1. Digital Image.
3. The third marriage was with MRS. MARTHA ANN FARMER (Memorial 151960580). As yet her maiden name is undetermined. She and J. R. were married on December 27, 1895 in Craven County, North Carolina. One of the witnesses at the marriage ceremony was J. R.'s daughter Daisy Medford by his second wife, Laura. They were married less than a year and a half when Martha died at the age of 41. Her death notice is as vague as the others. I did not create a source for her death since one was posted on her FindAGrave Memorial #151960580.
4. The fourth, and last, marriage was with SALOMA A. BANKS (Memorial 51960724). They had one daughter, Ruth May Medford (Memorial 29221741), b: 4 September 1899 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina, and d: on 31 October 1958 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina. After J. R. died Saloma married Charles W. Whitehurst in 1908.
Death called for J. R. Medford at 6:45 p.m. on Wednesday, September 13, 1905. Too early for State issued death certificates. An obituary was located, which discusses his death in detail about how he had been feeling unwell for several days, but didn't think his condition serious enough to stay home from work. He died of heart trouble on the side of the road one evening, as he road home from work at the saw mill. And, I wonder … as he passed through the Veil of death was Mary Catherine there to greet him?
I had put the majority of the following information under the Memorial of his first wife, Mary Catherine Evans. However, based on questions I've received, people are not seeing it. So I'm placing this on the Memorials of both Robert and Mary Catherine, since it involves both of them.
Mary Catherine Evans died after 1900, never knowing that her husband was still living … at least up to 1905. We don't really know when she died, but it was apparently before North Carolina began keeping State Death Certificates. Mary Catherine was originally interred in the Frank Edmondson Cemetery in Oak City, Martin County, North Carolina. According to her great-granddaughter, she was later exhumed and buried in the Trinity Episcopal Cemetery, Scotland Neck, Halifax, North Carolina by her son-in-law, Charles Daniel Brown.
Mary Catherine Evans is the daughter of Seth Evans and Marina (Rina/Rena) Hyman. She was one of five documented children. She and JOSEPH ROBERT MEDFORD were married just prior to 1870 in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had the following daughters:
1. Lula Timphany Medford (Memorial 69753873), born 13 October 1870 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 3 January 1902 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Mack Henry Warren on 3 February 1885 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. They had nine documented children.
2. Ida Elizabeth Medford (Memorial 67580310), born 25 January 1873 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 8 February 1966 in Portsmouth, Virginia. She married Charles Daniel Brown on 25 February 1896 in Goose Nest, Martin, North Carolina. They had seven documented children.
3. Carrie Medford, b: November 1877 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Robert L. Williford on 25 May 1898 in Tarboro, Edgecombe, North Carolina. Carrie and her husband have been difficult to locate after 1900. It doesn't appear they had children.
When researching your family tree one should remember the wise council of Val Greenwood, genealogical author and lecturer, in that our first responsibility is to the truth. In relation to Joseph Robert Medford the truth has been embraced... despite it being painful for his first family.
I am writing this for one of Joseph Robert Medford's descendants through is wife, Mary Catherine Evans. She is allowing me to include the letter written by Joseph Robert Medford to the family shortly before they were informed of his death, just prior to 1880.
PLEASE … Many people don't take the time to document, I am therefore asking that if this letter and/or story and research are used by anyone, then to please give credit to Miriam Kathleen Syme and OutOfMyTree (FAG 46880244). This letter has been in Miriam's possession since her mother died in 1980. Joseph Robert Medford is her great-grandfather and Mary Catherine Evans is her great-grandmother. It wasn't until we began researching her family that it was discovered that Joseph Robert Medford had actually deserted the family rather than having died. He became a BIGIMAST.
The letter has been more than valuable in piecing the events together. When Miriam first gave me the letter to read I have to admit that I was happy that his wife and daughters had this letter to hold and read over the years since they no longer had their husband and father. However, when it became clear that he didn't die I was able to see the letter in a different light. I now believe the letter makes it clear about the guilt Joseph Robert Medford was experiencing as he planned on making a permanent break with Mary Catherine and their children. I think it is evident that he loved his children, but he was at a point where he had to make a decision. It is pretty obvious there was not enough money to support two families.
How was it determined that Joseph Robert Medford didn't die? Well, basically it is just following through. Obviously, we cannot document every event in our ancestor's lives, but when it is an ancestor we should make every attempt to document their deaths as well as their births. So, I took the letter and tried to walk the same journey he did. His occupation was a great help in this. I was saddened when I found him living with a new family in 1880 … and of course I had to shift gears to try and find out the rest of his story.
Sometimes I've wondered if I should have told Miriam the truth about her great-grandfather. She has great love for him and would hold and caress the letter the same way I'm sure that her grandmother did. I do exactly the same when holding a love letter from my grandfather to my grandmother. It is an important connection that you can feel.
Miriam was sad to learn the truth, but to her credit she immediately forgave him and asked me to ensure that I identified all of his descendants, because she wanted to embrace them as members of her extended family. Everything about Miriam is pure class!
So, Joseph Robert Medford (herein called J. R.) had four documented relationships:
1. J. R. was first married to MARY CATHERINE EVANS (Memorial 178921593) in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had three daughters between 1870 and 1877. Mary suffered from debilitating arthritis and money was tight. The decision was therefore made for J. R. to obtain employment at the Saw Mill in Jones County, North Carolina. This job was to enable J. R. to earn more money. Until recently it was thought he had died prior to 1880. This is based on a letter the family received in 1878, followed by notification that he had died while working approximately 40 miles from Goldsboro where he was running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on the North Trent River in Jones County.
I will eventually scan the original letter and post it herein. Until then, here is the transcription. It was difficult to read and I've done my best:
-------------------- START --------------------
LETTER FROM J. R. MEDFORD TO HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN:
Nov 4th, 1878
To My
Dear little children that ______ me well but not well satisfied. I would be satisfied if you was with me. I want to see you very bad… so much so it makes me almost sick when I do study about you. Dear little babes I am at work for you. I am getting a good paid. I would send you some money now but I haven't got none now. I shall get some when my month is out and if I can't come I will send you some money then. If you are with your folk be good children until I do come. I will come after you just as soon as I can. I am about one hundred sixty miles from you and my work is so as I can't come when I do want to.
Page 2
I am running a long saw mill and my attention is called here all of the time. I wan you to come and stay with me a while. Little babe … unreadable … get some lady to wright you a letter and send to your papa for _____ want to hear from his little children being bad. Darling little babes I am a living about forty miles from Goldsboro in the north Trent River. There is no post office that is near me. So we have a lumber barg that goes up ... unreadable... So when you write me send your letter to Goldsboro and I will get it from there. There is no white people a _____ about hear only one white hand tat work at ____ mill. I am a farming … unreadable. I do get a plenty of meat and bread and flower [and] coffee to eat. I do want to stay hear until
Page 3
Christmas if nothing happens. Tell all of your folk howdy for me and tell them to take care of my little children until I do come and I will pay them well for it. I am feeling lone today. It's Sunday and I am a stranger hear. I have just been hear two weeks dear Darling little children. Write to your papa soon as you can and let me hear from you. I do want to see you more than bad. When I do come I am going to bring both of you a new dress a peace. Be good children. Nothing more… I will close by saying I remain your affectionate father until death.
J. R. Medford
To his darling little children… Lula, Ida and Carrie
Note written sideways at top of Page 1…
Do the best you can until I can send you some money _____. If I do come I can't stay but a little while.
Opposite of Page 1
Mary, I am well and doing very well. I am running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on North Trent River forty five miles from Goldsboro in Jones County. Take care of my children until I do come. I would send you some money but I haven't got it now, but I will have some in about ten or fifteen days and then I am going to send you and the children some. I want you to trust me. Just as soon as you do get this letter and let me know were all of my thing is … and how you all is getting a long. I want to stay here until Christmas before I do move you up hear. I want to see my children bad. I am a making some money. I have been hear about eight days. I can't get no money until I do work a month out. J. R. Medford
Note written sideways at top…
Git some lady who understand riting to wit your letter and have it backed to Goldsboro, NC. Kiss my little children for me. God bless them for I do want to see them.
-------------------- END --------------------
Mary Catherine, her children, and descendants have cherished this letter since 1878 never knowing that J. R. Medford had not died, but had in-fact deserted his first family and started a new family. The first clue was located while seeking documentation of his death when he was located alive and well on the 1880 census enumeration where it was evident he had a new family. He was enumerated as 40 years old and his occupation is identified as "Sawyer in Saw Mill". His place of birth is incorrectly identified as Connecticut, presumably out of guilt and the desire to mislead people.
2. J. R.'s second relationship was with LAURA N. BUNTING (Memorial 151960563) of Edgecombe County. Based on the birth year of their first child in 1875 this relationship began while both were living in Edgecombe County. It is doubtful they were officially married. J. R. and Laura also had three daughters, born between 1875 and 1882.
1. Martha Medford, b: abt 1875. (Note: This child may not actually be the daughter of J. R. However, both J. R. and Laura were both living in Edgecombe County at the same time. We don't know exactly when their relationship began. So far I have not been able to find any additional information about her.)
2. Daisy Florence Medford, (Memorial 175102687), b. 17 August 1879 in Goldsboro, Wayne, North Carolina, and d. on 1 May 1967 in Norfolk, Virginia. She married Zacchaeus Taylor Fulcher, (Memorial 175095835), who was born on 10 March 1880 in Cape Hatteras, Dare, North Carolina, and died on 19 May 1950 in Norfolk, Norfolk, Virginia.
3. Lillie M. Medford, (Memorial 151959830), b. 1882 in North Carolina, and died on 8 November 1892 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina.
Sometime after 1880, J. R. and Laura relocated to New Bern, Craven, North Carolina where Laura died on October 31, 1891. Her death notice was located in The Daily Journal (New Bern, NC) on Saturday, October 3, 1891, Page 1. There are a couple of others, as brief as this one. None identify any family members. This is the one attached to her record as a source, as follows:
"DIED -- Thursday evening Oct. 1st, Mrs. Laura N. Medford. The funeral services will be held at her late residence this morning at 9 o'clock on East Front Street, three doors from the corner of Pollock street. The friends and acquaintance of the family are invited to attend." Citation: www.NewsPapers.com, Saturday, October 3, 1891, The Daily Journal (New Bern, North Carolina), Page 1. Digital Image.
3. The third marriage was with MRS. MARTHA ANN FARMER (Memorial 151960580). As yet her maiden name is undetermined. She and J. R. were married on December 27, 1895 in Craven County, North Carolina. One of the witnesses at the marriage ceremony was J. R.'s daughter Daisy Medford by his second wife, Laura. They were married less than a year and a half when Martha died at the age of 41. Her death notice is as vague as the others. I did not create a source for her death since one was posted on her FindAGrave Memorial #151960580.
4. The fourth, and last, marriage was with SALOMA A. BANKS (Memorial 51960724). They had one daughter, Ruth May Medford (Memorial 29221741), b: 4 September 1899 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina, and d: on 31 October 1958 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina. After J. R. died Saloma married Charles W. Whitehurst in 1908.
Death called for J. R. Medford at 6:45 p.m. on Wednesday, September 13, 1905. Too early for State issued death certificates. An obituary was located, which discusses his death in detail about how he had been feeling unwell for several days, but didn't think his condition serious enough to stay home from work. He died of heart trouble on the side of the road one evening, as he road home from work at the saw mill. And, I wonder … as he passed through the Veil of death was Mary Catherine there to greet him?
Joseph Robert Medford (who mainly went by the name Robert, or J.R.) has certainly been an elusive ancestor, especially if you are descended through his first wife Mary Catherine Evans. This is because although notified of his death, Robert had in fact taken a new wife. He became a BIGAMIST.
I had put the majority of the following information under the Memorial of his first wife, Mary Catherine Evans. However, based on questions I've received, people are not seeing it. So I'm placing this on the Memorials of both Robert and Mary Catherine, since it involves both of them.
Mary Catherine Evans died after 1900, never knowing that her husband was still living … at least up to 1905. We don't really know when she died, but it was apparently before North Carolina began keeping State Death Certificates. Mary Catherine was originally interred in the Frank Edmondson Cemetery in Oak City, Martin County, North Carolina. According to her great-granddaughter, she was later exhumed and buried in the Trinity Episcopal Cemetery, Scotland Neck, Halifax, North Carolina by her son-in-law, Charles Daniel Brown.
Mary Catherine Evans is the daughter of Seth Evans and Marina (Rina/Rena) Hyman. She was one of five documented children. She and JOSEPH ROBERT MEDFORD were married just prior to 1870 in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had the following daughters:
1. Lula Timphany Medford (Memorial 69753873), born 13 October 1870 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 3 January 1902 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Mack Henry Warren on 3 February 1885 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. They had nine documented children.
2. Ida Elizabeth Medford (Memorial 67580310), born 25 January 1873 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 8 February 1966 in Portsmouth, Virginia. She married Charles Daniel Brown on 25 February 1896 in Goose Nest, Martin, North Carolina. They had seven documented children.
3. Carrie Medford, b: November 1877 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Robert L. Williford on 25 May 1898 in Tarboro, Edgecombe, North Carolina. Carrie and her husband have been difficult to locate after 1900. It doesn't appear they had children.
When researching your family tree one should remember the wise council of Val Greenwood, genealogical author and lecturer, in that our first responsibility is to the truth. In relation to Joseph Robert Medford the truth has been embraced... despite it being painful for his first family.
I am writing this for one of Joseph Robert Medford's descendants through is wife, Mary Catherine Evans. She is allowing me to include the letter written by Joseph Robert Medford to the family shortly before they were informed of his death, just prior to 1880.
PLEASE … Many people don't take the time to document, I am therefore asking that if this letter and/or story and research are used by anyone, then to please give credit to Miriam Kathleen Syme and OutOfMyTree (FAG 46880244). This letter has been in Miriam's possession since her mother died in 1980. Joseph Robert Medford is her great-grandfather and Mary Catherine Evans is her great-grandmother. It wasn't until we began researching her family that it was discovered that Joseph Robert Medford had actually deserted the family rather than having died. He became a BIGIMAST.
The letter has been more than valuable in piecing the events together. When Miriam first gave me the letter to read I have to admit that I was happy that his wife and daughters had this letter to hold and read over the years since they no longer had their husband and father. However, when it became clear that he didn't die I was able to see the letter in a different light. I now believe the letter makes it clear about the guilt Joseph Robert Medford was experiencing as he planned on making a permanent break with Mary Catherine and their children. I think it is evident that he loved his children, but he was at a point where he had to make a decision. It is pretty obvious there was not enough money to support two families.
How was it determined that Joseph Robert Medford didn't die? Well, basically it is just following through. Obviously, we cannot document every event in our ancestor's lives, but when it is an ancestor we should make every attempt to document their deaths as well as their births. So, I took the letter and tried to walk the same journey he did. His occupation was a great help in this. I was saddened when I found him living with a new family in 1880 … and of course I had to shift gears to try and find out the rest of his story.
Sometimes I've wondered if I should have told Miriam the truth about her great-grandfather. She has great love for him and would hold and caress the letter the same way I'm sure that her grandmother did. I do exactly the same when holding a love letter from my grandfather to my grandmother. It is an important connection that you can feel.
Miriam was sad to learn the truth, but to her credit she immediately forgave him and asked me to ensure that I identified all of his descendants, because she wanted to embrace them as members of her extended family. Everything about Miriam is pure class!
So, Joseph Robert Medford (herein called J. R.) had four documented relationships:
1. J. R. was first married to MARY CATHERINE EVANS (Memorial 178921593) in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had three daughters between 1870 and 1877. Mary suffered from debilitating arthritis and money was tight. The decision was therefore made for J. R. to obtain employment at the Saw Mill in Jones County, North Carolina. This job was to enable J. R. to earn more money. Until recently it was thought he had died prior to 1880. This is based on a letter the family received in 1878, followed by notification that he had died while working approximately 40 miles from Goldsboro where he was running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on the North Trent River in Jones County.
I will eventually scan the original letter and post it herein. Until then, here is the transcription. It was difficult to read and I've done my best:
-------------------- START --------------------
LETTER FROM J. R. MEDFORD TO HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN:
Nov 4th, 1878
To My
Dear little children that ______ me well but not well satisfied. I would be satisfied if you was with me. I want to see you very bad… so much so it makes me almost sick when I do study about you. Dear little babes I am at work for you. I am getting a good paid. I would send you some money now but I haven't got none now. I shall get some when my month is out and if I can't come I will send you some money then. If you are with your folk be good children until I do come. I will come after you just as soon as I can. I am about one hundred sixty miles from you and my work is so as I can't come when I do want to.
Page 2
I am running a long saw mill and my attention is called here all of the time. I wan you to come and stay with me a while. Little babe … unreadable … get some lady to wright you a letter and send to your papa for _____ want to hear from his little children being bad. Darling little babes I am a living about forty miles from Goldsboro in the north Trent River. There is no post office that is near me. So we have a lumber barg that goes up ... unreadable... So when you write me send your letter to Goldsboro and I will get it from there. There is no white people a _____ about hear only one white hand tat work at ____ mill. I am a farming … unreadable. I do get a plenty of meat and bread and flower [and] coffee to eat. I do want to stay hear until
Page 3
Christmas if nothing happens. Tell all of your folk howdy for me and tell them to take care of my little children until I do come and I will pay them well for it. I am feeling lone today. It's Sunday and I am a stranger hear. I have just been hear two weeks dear Darling little children. Write to your papa soon as you can and let me hear from you. I do want to see you more than bad. When I do come I am going to bring both of you a new dress a peace. Be good children. Nothing more… I will close by saying I remain your affectionate father until death.
J. R. Medford
To his darling little children… Lula, Ida and Carrie
Note written sideways at top of Page 1…
Do the best you can until I can send you some money _____. If I do come I can't stay but a little while.
Opposite of Page 1
Mary, I am well and doing very well. I am running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on North Trent River forty five miles from Goldsboro in Jones County. Take care of my children until I do come. I would send you some money but I haven't got it now, but I will have some in about ten or fifteen days and then I am going to send you and the children some. I want you to trust me. Just as soon as you do get this letter and let me know were all of my thing is … and how you all is getting a long. I want to stay here until Christmas before I do move you up hear. I want to see my children bad. I am a making some money. I have been hear about eight days. I can't get no money until I do work a month out. J. R. Medford
Note written sideways at top…
Git some lady who understand riting to wit your letter and have it backed to Goldsboro, NC. Kiss my little children for me. God bless them for I do want to see them.
-------------------- END --------------------
Mary Catherine, her children, and descendants have cherished this letter since 1878 never knowing that J. R. Medford had not died, but had in-fact deserted his first family and started a new family. The first clue was located while seeking documentation of his death when he was located alive and well on the 1880 census enumeration where it was evident he had a new family. He was enumerated as 40 years old and his occupation is identified as "Sawyer in Saw Mill". His place of birth is incorrectly identified as Connecticut, presumably out of guilt and the desire to mislead people.
2. J. R.'s second relationship was with LAURA N. BUNTING (Memorial 151960563) of Edgecombe County. Based on the birth year of their first child in 1875 this relationship began while both were living in Edgecombe County. It is doubtful they were officially married. J. R. and Laura also had three daughters, born between 1875 and 1882.
1. Martha Medford, b: abt 1875. (Note: This child may not actually be the daughter of J. R. However, both J. R. and Laura were both living in Edgecombe County at the same time. We don't know exactly when their relationship began. So far I have not been able to find any additional information about her.)
2. Daisy Florence Medford, (Memorial 175102687), b. 17 August 1879 in Goldsboro, Wayne, North Carolina, and d. on 1 May 1967 in Norfolk, Virginia. She married Zacchaeus Taylor Fulcher, (Memorial 175095835), who was born on 10 March 1880 in Cape Hatteras, Dare, North Carolina, and died on 19 May 1950 in Norfolk, Norfolk, Virginia.
3. Lillie M. Medford, (Memorial 151959830), b. 1882 in North Carolina, and died on 8 November 1892 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina.
Sometime after 1880, J. R. and Laura relocated to New Bern, Craven, North Carolina where Laura died on October 31, 1891. Her death notice was located in The Daily Journal (New Bern, NC) on Saturday, October 3, 1891, Page 1. There are a couple of others, as brief as this one. None identify any family members. This is the one attached to her record as a source, as follows:
"DIED -- Thursday evening Oct. 1st, Mrs. Laura N. Medford. The funeral services will be held at her late residence this morning at 9 o'clock on East Front Street, three doors from the corner of Pollock street. The friends and acquaintance of the family are invited to attend." Citation: www.NewsPapers.com, Saturday, October 3, 1891, The Daily Journal (New Bern, North Carolina), Page 1. Digital Image.
3. The third marriage was with MRS. MARTHA ANN FARMER (Memorial 151960580). As yet her maiden name is undetermined. She and J. R. were married on December 27, 1895 in Craven County, North Carolina. One of the witnesses at the marriage ceremony was J. R.'s daughter Daisy Medford by his second wife, Laura. They were married less than a year and a half when Martha died at the age of 41. Her death notice is as vague as the others. I did not create a source for her death since one was posted on her FindAGrave Memorial #151960580.
4. The fourth, and last, marriage was with SALOMA A. BANKS (Memorial 51960724). They had one daughter, Ruth May Medford (Memorial 29221741), b: 4 September 1899 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina, and d: on 31 October 1958 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina. After J. R. died Saloma married Charles W. Whitehurst in 1908.
Death called for J. R. Medford at 6:45 p.m. on Wednesday, September 13, 1905. Too early for State issued death certificates. An obituary was located, which discusses his death in detail about how he had been feeling unwell for several days, but didn't think his condition serious enough to stay home from work. He died of heart trouble on the side of the road one evening, as he road home from work at the saw mill. And, I wonder … as he passed through the Veil of death was Mary Catherine there to greet him?
I had put the majority of the following information under the Memorial of his first wife, Mary Catherine Evans. However, based on questions I've received, people are not seeing it. So I'm placing this on the Memorials of both Robert and Mary Catherine, since it involves both of them.
Mary Catherine Evans died after 1900, never knowing that her husband was still living … at least up to 1905. We don't really know when she died, but it was apparently before North Carolina began keeping State Death Certificates. Mary Catherine was originally interred in the Frank Edmondson Cemetery in Oak City, Martin County, North Carolina. According to her great-granddaughter, she was later exhumed and buried in the Trinity Episcopal Cemetery, Scotland Neck, Halifax, North Carolina by her son-in-law, Charles Daniel Brown.
Mary Catherine Evans is the daughter of Seth Evans and Marina (Rina/Rena) Hyman. She was one of five documented children. She and JOSEPH ROBERT MEDFORD were married just prior to 1870 in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had the following daughters:
1. Lula Timphany Medford (Memorial 69753873), born 13 October 1870 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 3 January 1902 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Mack Henry Warren on 3 February 1885 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. They had nine documented children.
2. Ida Elizabeth Medford (Memorial 67580310), born 25 January 1873 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina, and died on 8 February 1966 in Portsmouth, Virginia. She married Charles Daniel Brown on 25 February 1896 in Goose Nest, Martin, North Carolina. They had seven documented children.
3. Carrie Medford, b: November 1877 in Goose Nest Township, Martin, North Carolina. She married Robert L. Williford on 25 May 1898 in Tarboro, Edgecombe, North Carolina. Carrie and her husband have been difficult to locate after 1900. It doesn't appear they had children.
When researching your family tree one should remember the wise council of Val Greenwood, genealogical author and lecturer, in that our first responsibility is to the truth. In relation to Joseph Robert Medford the truth has been embraced... despite it being painful for his first family.
I am writing this for one of Joseph Robert Medford's descendants through is wife, Mary Catherine Evans. She is allowing me to include the letter written by Joseph Robert Medford to the family shortly before they were informed of his death, just prior to 1880.
PLEASE … Many people don't take the time to document, I am therefore asking that if this letter and/or story and research are used by anyone, then to please give credit to Miriam Kathleen Syme and OutOfMyTree (FAG 46880244). This letter has been in Miriam's possession since her mother died in 1980. Joseph Robert Medford is her great-grandfather and Mary Catherine Evans is her great-grandmother. It wasn't until we began researching her family that it was discovered that Joseph Robert Medford had actually deserted the family rather than having died. He became a BIGIMAST.
The letter has been more than valuable in piecing the events together. When Miriam first gave me the letter to read I have to admit that I was happy that his wife and daughters had this letter to hold and read over the years since they no longer had their husband and father. However, when it became clear that he didn't die I was able to see the letter in a different light. I now believe the letter makes it clear about the guilt Joseph Robert Medford was experiencing as he planned on making a permanent break with Mary Catherine and their children. I think it is evident that he loved his children, but he was at a point where he had to make a decision. It is pretty obvious there was not enough money to support two families.
How was it determined that Joseph Robert Medford didn't die? Well, basically it is just following through. Obviously, we cannot document every event in our ancestor's lives, but when it is an ancestor we should make every attempt to document their deaths as well as their births. So, I took the letter and tried to walk the same journey he did. His occupation was a great help in this. I was saddened when I found him living with a new family in 1880 … and of course I had to shift gears to try and find out the rest of his story.
Sometimes I've wondered if I should have told Miriam the truth about her great-grandfather. She has great love for him and would hold and caress the letter the same way I'm sure that her grandmother did. I do exactly the same when holding a love letter from my grandfather to my grandmother. It is an important connection that you can feel.
Miriam was sad to learn the truth, but to her credit she immediately forgave him and asked me to ensure that I identified all of his descendants, because she wanted to embrace them as members of her extended family. Everything about Miriam is pure class!
So, Joseph Robert Medford (herein called J. R.) had four documented relationships:
1. J. R. was first married to MARY CATHERINE EVANS (Memorial 178921593) in Edgecombe County, North Carolina. They had three daughters between 1870 and 1877. Mary suffered from debilitating arthritis and money was tight. The decision was therefore made for J. R. to obtain employment at the Saw Mill in Jones County, North Carolina. This job was to enable J. R. to earn more money. Until recently it was thought he had died prior to 1880. This is based on a letter the family received in 1878, followed by notification that he had died while working approximately 40 miles from Goldsboro where he was running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on the North Trent River in Jones County.
I will eventually scan the original letter and post it herein. Until then, here is the transcription. It was difficult to read and I've done my best:
-------------------- START --------------------
LETTER FROM J. R. MEDFORD TO HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN:
Nov 4th, 1878
To My
Dear little children that ______ me well but not well satisfied. I would be satisfied if you was with me. I want to see you very bad… so much so it makes me almost sick when I do study about you. Dear little babes I am at work for you. I am getting a good paid. I would send you some money now but I haven't got none now. I shall get some when my month is out and if I can't come I will send you some money then. If you are with your folk be good children until I do come. I will come after you just as soon as I can. I am about one hundred sixty miles from you and my work is so as I can't come when I do want to.
Page 2
I am running a long saw mill and my attention is called here all of the time. I wan you to come and stay with me a while. Little babe … unreadable … get some lady to wright you a letter and send to your papa for _____ want to hear from his little children being bad. Darling little babes I am a living about forty miles from Goldsboro in the north Trent River. There is no post office that is near me. So we have a lumber barg that goes up ... unreadable... So when you write me send your letter to Goldsboro and I will get it from there. There is no white people a _____ about hear only one white hand tat work at ____ mill. I am a farming … unreadable. I do get a plenty of meat and bread and flower [and] coffee to eat. I do want to stay hear until
Page 3
Christmas if nothing happens. Tell all of your folk howdy for me and tell them to take care of my little children until I do come and I will pay them well for it. I am feeling lone today. It's Sunday and I am a stranger hear. I have just been hear two weeks dear Darling little children. Write to your papa soon as you can and let me hear from you. I do want to see you more than bad. When I do come I am going to bring both of you a new dress a peace. Be good children. Nothing more… I will close by saying I remain your affectionate father until death.
J. R. Medford
To his darling little children… Lula, Ida and Carrie
Note written sideways at top of Page 1…
Do the best you can until I can send you some money _____. If I do come I can't stay but a little while.
Opposite of Page 1
Mary, I am well and doing very well. I am running a lazy Steam Saw Mill on North Trent River forty five miles from Goldsboro in Jones County. Take care of my children until I do come. I would send you some money but I haven't got it now, but I will have some in about ten or fifteen days and then I am going to send you and the children some. I want you to trust me. Just as soon as you do get this letter and let me know were all of my thing is … and how you all is getting a long. I want to stay here until Christmas before I do move you up hear. I want to see my children bad. I am a making some money. I have been hear about eight days. I can't get no money until I do work a month out. J. R. Medford
Note written sideways at top…
Git some lady who understand riting to wit your letter and have it backed to Goldsboro, NC. Kiss my little children for me. God bless them for I do want to see them.
-------------------- END --------------------
Mary Catherine, her children, and descendants have cherished this letter since 1878 never knowing that J. R. Medford had not died, but had in-fact deserted his first family and started a new family. The first clue was located while seeking documentation of his death when he was located alive and well on the 1880 census enumeration where it was evident he had a new family. He was enumerated as 40 years old and his occupation is identified as "Sawyer in Saw Mill". His place of birth is incorrectly identified as Connecticut, presumably out of guilt and the desire to mislead people.
2. J. R.'s second relationship was with LAURA N. BUNTING (Memorial 151960563) of Edgecombe County. Based on the birth year of their first child in 1875 this relationship began while both were living in Edgecombe County. It is doubtful they were officially married. J. R. and Laura also had three daughters, born between 1875 and 1882.
1. Martha Medford, b: abt 1875. (Note: This child may not actually be the daughter of J. R. However, both J. R. and Laura were both living in Edgecombe County at the same time. We don't know exactly when their relationship began. So far I have not been able to find any additional information about her.)
2. Daisy Florence Medford, (Memorial 175102687), b. 17 August 1879 in Goldsboro, Wayne, North Carolina, and d. on 1 May 1967 in Norfolk, Virginia. She married Zacchaeus Taylor Fulcher, (Memorial 175095835), who was born on 10 March 1880 in Cape Hatteras, Dare, North Carolina, and died on 19 May 1950 in Norfolk, Norfolk, Virginia.
3. Lillie M. Medford, (Memorial 151959830), b. 1882 in North Carolina, and died on 8 November 1892 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina.
Sometime after 1880, J. R. and Laura relocated to New Bern, Craven, North Carolina where Laura died on October 31, 1891. Her death notice was located in The Daily Journal (New Bern, NC) on Saturday, October 3, 1891, Page 1. There are a couple of others, as brief as this one. None identify any family members. This is the one attached to her record as a source, as follows:
"DIED -- Thursday evening Oct. 1st, Mrs. Laura N. Medford. The funeral services will be held at her late residence this morning at 9 o'clock on East Front Street, three doors from the corner of Pollock street. The friends and acquaintance of the family are invited to attend." Citation: www.NewsPapers.com, Saturday, October 3, 1891, The Daily Journal (New Bern, North Carolina), Page 1. Digital Image.
3. The third marriage was with MRS. MARTHA ANN FARMER (Memorial 151960580). As yet her maiden name is undetermined. She and J. R. were married on December 27, 1895 in Craven County, North Carolina. One of the witnesses at the marriage ceremony was J. R.'s daughter Daisy Medford by his second wife, Laura. They were married less than a year and a half when Martha died at the age of 41. Her death notice is as vague as the others. I did not create a source for her death since one was posted on her FindAGrave Memorial #151960580.
4. The fourth, and last, marriage was with SALOMA A. BANKS (Memorial 51960724). They had one daughter, Ruth May Medford (Memorial 29221741), b: 4 September 1899 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina, and d: on 31 October 1958 in New Bern, Craven, North Carolina. After J. R. died Saloma married Charles W. Whitehurst in 1908.
Death called for J. R. Medford at 6:45 p.m. on Wednesday, September 13, 1905. Too early for State issued death certificates. An obituary was located, which discusses his death in detail about how he had been feeling unwell for several days, but didn't think his condition serious enough to stay home from work. He died of heart trouble on the side of the road one evening, as he road home from work at the saw mill. And, I wonder … as he passed through the Veil of death was Mary Catherine there to greet him?
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