|Heather Hendrix (#47246106)|
| || member for 5 years, 11 months, 16 days|
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|Wanda Hastings||Frog's picture|
This is a beautiful painting of 'Frog' but it does not capture his lively personality. I don't know if his personality could ever by explained in any picture of him. He was always so full of life.
|Wanda Hastings||Emma J. Hendrix photo|
That is a great picture of Emma(er). Thank you for posting it. Any time we have a question about some of the old family members, Mama says, "Emmer would know."
Sometimes I need to reach out to you because this is the only acceptable place to grieve. Mother has now been gone 10 months. Most of the world thinks that is enough time to be on with my life. Papers finaled and settled, bills surrounding her death are paid. Life moves on. Things are moving but I am standing still.
I had a memorial video done when my Dad died. Many pictures set to music. When my Mom died, I had one done for her and put my Dad's on the same DVD. Now it is hundreds of pictures and seems like a root canal to watch.
I viewed it tonight for the first time since I buried her.
What I saw was babies, toddlers, young adults, young adults that found each other and fell in love. They grew up together. Over and over I replayed each picture in my head. It was the days before the responsibility of family life and work. While love was fresh and dreams were being built. The look of two people who loved each other and nothing was ever going to stop them. The days I was their baby and remembered the picture being taken.
What kept coming back to me was how real their lives were. That they had a childhood and a life. Even when I can't see them, it somehow goes on. We all are touched with life, our own and the loss of the lives taken from us. All over these pictures were people communicating love, with a gentle hug, a smile, eyes shining with hope. As I view the pictures of your loved ones on your memorials, I see the same lives, the same hope, the same "I leave you with my love."
So tonight I just wanted to say they are sending us their love, I know they are not gone but live on in our eyes, in our hope. In everything that made them, also makes us.
I don't want to stand still anymore. I want their lives to shine through me. I don't even know if it's possible. I have to learn how to grieve, I don't think I have been doing this right. I think part of grief is letting go, that courage that only we, can find deep within us that "they" put there. There is no doubt in my mind that our loved ones will give us the courage to grieve and let go.
Anyway I needed you tonight and I thank you for friendship and helping me find the courage that my Mom and Dad gave me.
Added by Diane ღ on Jun 14, 2010 10:17 PM
I had such a totally amazing thing happen. A bird, just a little sparrow flew into a picture window. It bounced off and a few minutes later I thought, I wonder if he made it ok?
I went out and found this little bird on his back in the stones and I picked him up, He was alive to my amazement. I did not know what to do with it. He looked broken and like, no way was it going to live through this. I held him and could feel his little heart beating. I prayed. It reminded me of all the people that I have taken care of over the years that were dieing, and how the families prayed. How I silently prayed that somehow this person would get through this. Always trying to hide my emotion at the bed side. Don't cry, don't let them see you cry. Your the nurse, be the strong shoulder.
So as I held this little bird thinking should I... 911 him to a vet....no that is crazy. I just prayed. Ok, God, he is yours and he is broken and he is suffering, and God, I can't watch him die today. Please do something. Come get him or send an Angel or something. I put a soft cloth up in a tree and put him up as high off the ground as I could get him, where no cat could come and find him to be a tasty snack.
I grieved, and I watched out the window. I could see it just sitting. Of course you start, thinking how much involvement do I want to have with this bird? Ok I could put it in a shoe box....then how to feed it, I don't have a clue. Back to God...Ok "help". 2 hours went by. I am sure he is dead by now. I went out climbed up the tree. Realizing, I am not that young anymore. He was still alive. I reached out and stroked his head. He made direct eye contact, and flew away.
I heard God say to me, "my eye IS on the sparrow and it IS on you".
So today a victory. God IS in his kingdom and his eye is on us.
It's sunny, warm and spring is here, and somewhere out there is a very special little sparrow who winged his way into my life today. And for just a minute I could feel that God is with us and he loves us, and once in awhile he lets them live.
Added by Diane ღ on May 16, 2010 3:35 PM
|Diane ღ||Happy Easter|
The day between Good Friday and Easter Day makes us aware of the end of one world and the complete newness of salvation that will be here on Easter morning by the Resurrection of Christ. So today it is Holy Saturday. I think about Jesus laying in the tomb today. About what must have been happening...some parts of the bible say he lay in death. I don't know what that means exactly, at least for him. I guess nobody really knows.
All my life on Good Friday the sky's turn dark and cloudy between 2 and 4 in the afternoon. Yesterday did not disappoint. The sky turned dark and cold for a few minutes and then the sun shown through. Even here in the sunshine state it was dark for a few minutes. I hear in my head "it is finished" I always go back to what I have felt other Mone-day Thursdays, Good Fridays, Holy Saturdays and then the Easter resurrection. And that is He shed His precious blood on Calvary so that you and I can have eternal life with Him. We are unworthy of the price He paid for us, but I am so glad, He loves us that much. So tomorrow morning the sun will come up on a new day, and centuries ago this is what happened, as stated in the scriptures.
Now after the Sabbath, toward the dawn of the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to see the sepulcher. And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven and came and rolled back the stone; and sat upon it. His appearance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow. And for fear of him the guards trembled and became like dead men. But the angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid; for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here; for he has risen, as he said. Come, see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples that he has risen from the dead, and behold, he is going before you to Galilee; there you will see him. Lo, I have told you." So they departed quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to tell his disciples. And behold, Jesus met them and said, "Hail!" And they came up and took hold of his feet and worshiped him. Then Jesus said to them, "Do not be afraid; go and tell my brethren to go to Galilee, and there they will see me."
It began that morning just as this morning began but with a new hope. Easter celebrates hope sprung from despair, so yesterdays sorrow must go away, and be replaced with hope. I am more spiritual than religious, I don't go to church. I just believe.
May this Easter bring you hope, love and joy and a trail of bread crumbs to follow back to that joy, if somehow you have lost your way.
Added by Diane ღ on Apr 03, 2010 9:36 AM
Happy Saint Patrick's Day dear friend of mine.
|Tricia Russell||Cranes & Corn|
I beleive that Carolina and I can both help you. I have a healthy dose of them too, in my Sheffield research...
are you still with me ?????