Actions
Begin New Search
Refine Last Search
Cemetery Lookup
Add Burial Records
Help with Find A Grave

Top Contributors
Success Stories
Discussion Forums
Find A Grave Store

Log In
Kris Gilbert (#46623374)
 member for 10 years, 10 months, 8 days
[Add to MyFriends]
Bio and Links
Bio Photo An open letter to people who harass me about not adding obits:

Find A Grave specifically states "Do not copy obituary notices from newspapers (or from funeral home notices or web sites) to an individual's memorial record unless you have permission from the newspaper to do so or you are the author of the obituary."

I understand the desire to help someone fill in their family tree, but this is not the place. This is Find A Grave. It's about finding a person's grave. I stopped adding obits when families started contacting me with concerns about insensitivity. I recently started up again by adding only facts and newspaper or funeral home information.

Just this week my cousin's grandfather died. His obituary was copied and pasted from the funeral home into his Find A Grave memorial. His grandchildren spent weeks at his bedside while he was dying and carefully created his obituary for publication in the newspaper for his family and friends. Now their names and home cities as well as their minor children's names are placed on this site without a second thought given to their grief and loss or impropriety. You seem to have completely forgotten about the people you claim to be so eager to help!

Another note from the site rules: "Please do not include the names of living or surviving relatives in the biography, unless you have their permission." I asked my cousin. No one got her permission to put her children's names on this site.

But, who cares? It's all about the numbers, right? Or, who got here first. Or, it's in the newspaper online, so what? I've heard them all. It doesn't make it right.

I've had churches call me and ask what people are thinking. I don't know what to tell them.

In the 10 years I've been doing this, I've only had one person ask to add their names back in to the surviving relatives.

If you don't like the rules, petition to have them changed or go build your own site. It's as simple as that. Here is a site with good information on obituary copyright to get you started: The Legal Genealogist
 Contact:
or
Leave Public Message
Contributions to
Find A Grave
 • 20,302 Memorials Added
 • 20,783 Memorials Managed
 • 36 Memorials/Week
 • 13,921 Photos
 • 1 Photo Request
 • 362 Volunteer Photos Taken
 • 797 Virtual Flowers
 • 5 Virtual Cemeteries
 • 1 Fame Rating
 • 7 Sponsorships
 • 11 Friends
Search Contributor's Records

 
First NameLast Name

Virtual Cemeteries
Allemang Virtual Cemetery (99)
Brooklyn Relative (6)
Fire Department (4)
Oregon Woman's Relief... (23)
Veterans Buried in Ogle C... (1156)
Find A Grave Friends
Alva Van Houten..., Ben Jacobson, Bo shj, David Lee Zelle..., Diana Snodgrass, Donna Baumann, Jonathan Coulte..., Leitha Ingram, mark blais, Peg Allen Arno..., William J Gilbe...
Messages left for Kris Gilbert (462)[Leave Message]
Rick Jennings
RE: Headstones
OK, I promise. No chalk, no shaving cream.

Have you heard of the aluminum foil method? I've not used it but have seen impressive pics of results. Check this memorial on FindAGrave: 38952943. Use thin foil and a soft brush to push foil into impressions. Make sure any tape used is foil to foil only.

I've also experimented with using mirrors to direct sunlight to specific areas of interest.
Added by Rick Jennings on Apr 26, 2015 10:49 AM
Rick Jennings
RE: Johnathan Jenkins
Don't know anything about Johnathan in the Civil War, but there is this possibility:

Battle Unit Name:123rd Regiment, Illinois Infantry
Side:Union
Company:K
Soldier's Rank In:Corporal
Soldier's Rank Out:Corporal
Alternate name:John W./Jenkins
Film Number:M539 ROLL 45
Plaque Number:
Notes:General Note - Original filed under John W./Jenkins

Re reading tombstone info, I would recommend chalk or shaving cream unless management forbids.
Rick
Added by Rick Jennings on Apr 25, 2015 5:49 PM
Rick Jennings
RE: Miranda Jenkins
Thanks so much! I see you've already got Miranda (was Matilda) updated along with her dates and inscription. Excellent!

Emmaline is another daughter - Miranda's sister.

I can't read anything on Rebecca's updated photo: can you tell me what it says? I had thought she was Johnathan's wife, but she's probably too young (14??)

Rick




Added by Rick Jennings on Apr 25, 2015 3:24 PM
Rick Jennings
RE: Miranda Jenkins
Very good of you, thanks!
Rick
Added by Rick Jennings on Apr 25, 2015 11:11 AM
Rick Jennings
Miranda Jenkins
Hello,
Is Johnathan Jenkins on the reverse side of the Miranda Jenkins memorial you shot?
It would seem so, as you posted pictures of both of the them on Miranda's memorial page.
Johnathan is a relative of mine, and I'm wondering if Miranda is a daughter or possibly even his 1st wife.
Many thanks,
Rick Jennings
Added by Rick Jennings on Apr 24, 2015 5:30 PM
Derwin
Harriet Margaret Mayhew Nichols Bogue
Added photo of Harriet with daughter Mary Clarissa
Added by Derwin on Mar 17, 2015 6:32 PM
Kerry Rae Smith Moser
RE: Joseph Lockhart
it used to pop up a message box saying you can't link people to themselves..
Added by Kerry Rae Smith Moser on Mar 08, 2015 12:42 PM
Kerry Rae Smith Moser
RE: Joseph Lockhart
Oh,, sorry, put the wrong # in the box.. will re-do it..
Added by Kerry Rae Smith Moser on Mar 07, 2015 4:26 PM
Elsie Harmon
RE: Goldie and Amber Warner
I thought you were referring to a picture of Goldie, Amber, Annie and Charles Warner that I have. Maybe other people have it but it was taken at their farm when we visited them. Goldie and Amber took care of the whole farm, milked the cows in a bucket, then carried to the big metal container to be picked up by a driver for the milk place in Dixon. They cooked and cleaned the house. I don't think Charlie was in good health and Annie was just a tiny little thing. Their one brother had passed away so it was left to the girls to do the work. I felt sorry for them.
They had an old organ in the house which Amber or Goldie played for us. I tried it and enjoyed it too.
A wonderful family and great memories there.
Elsie
Added by Elsie Harmon on Mar 02, 2015 2:02 PM
Elsie Harmon
RE: Goldie and Amber Warner
Yes they were sisters. Is the picture one with their parents?
Elsie
Added by Elsie Harmon on Mar 01, 2015 9:09 PM
[View all messages...]
 

Privacy Statement and Terms of Service