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Rhonda (#47188460)
 member for 4 years, 11 months, 18 days
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Bio and Links
Bio Photo We have just gone thru the worst 5 years of our lives. We have lost grandparents, aunts, uncles, parents and even 2 siblings. Loosing a child is the worst.
I can now let go of the unimaginable idea that our daughter would come back alive and all this would have been a bad dream. I must be crazy to even think such an idea.
I've learned thru all this, that there are two types of pain when you loose someone so special. There is "grief". The time that just overcomes you, sucks all the breath from your lungs, your heart stops and there is no end to the tears.
Then there is "mourning". That is the dull, lost, ache, anger, disorganized life that you feel all the rest of the time. AND "grief" can show his ugly head again, when you least expect it. A memory, a song, a picture, a smell, or someone that looks like her can trigger it, and doesn't matter if I'm in a store, riding in the car, in a resturant, or out with friends. Nothing can stop it from over taking me.
I was recently working in the garden when "grief" paid a visit. I grabbed a shovel and beat the living crap out of a lilac bush. The shovel gave me power. I didn't want to be the woman that lost a beautiful daughter. I hated the world and everything in it. I even questioned my faith. I was exhausted yet felt empowered. I knew I HAD to make changes. I HAD to learn to breathe again. I HAD to learn to LIVE until God called ME home to be with her again. I'll live, just not sure about the lilac bush. Shirley, Rhonda's mom.
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2. Aunts/Uncles/Cousins (10)
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Messages left for Rhonda (232)[Leave Message]
Rhonda C. Poynter & Friends
Your Daughter
Hi, I just first want to say that I almost feel as though I should apologize about my first name, I hope that it doesn't upset you....then I want to tell you that I actually think I came across Rhonda's page in the past, but I lost my mom last August, and I have just been trying to get back on my feet, so to speak...I can't recall whether I left Roni a token in the past or not, but here I am, now. Your memorial really touched my heart, as our own family went through so much of the same issues due to addiction; my brother Ron and my dad Ron, Sr. (Jr. to everybody) both lost their lives to addiction, and it's a case of no matter what people around the addicted individual do, it isn't enough, it's too much, it's the wrong thing, it's the right thing at the wrong time. =( I hope that you will feel free to say hi once in awhile, and if you would like me to highlight your daughter's page (my profile will explain that more), do let me know, I would be honored. Sorry this was so long; Take Care and remember that people do care. Best, RCP and Gannon Blue
Added by Rhonda C. Poynter & Frien... on Mar 31, 2014 12:04 AM
roy mattox
THANKS!
thank you for making the correction to the Barbara Ann Boyd Cox memorial. I appreciate it very much. and thanks for the work you do on findagrave. have found this to be an excellent tool for tracing genealogy.
Added by roy mattox on Nov 11, 2013 3:32 PM
roy mattox
barbara ann boyd cox
in the memorial you have created for Barbara ann boyd cox you have a picture for center point cemetery. Barbara was my first cousin and I can assure you that she is NOT buried at center point. she IS buried at Deerfield in Lawrence County Tennessee. I have added a picture of their headstone to that memorial. I would greatly appreciate it if you could correct the error. thank you for your work with findagrave.
Added by roy mattox on Nov 10, 2013 3:55 PM
Thelma J. Stockmaster-Scarborough
Lost of my son, Floyd
Hi Rhonda
I worked for Columbia Gas of Ohio for 36 years and I'm making a Memorial Book for our Main Library, Michigan St., Toledo, Ohio. I took care of all the Benefits for the employee of the Gas Co. I remember David Dryden and James Mattox and help them when they retired. I see they are part of your family. But when I read your Bio about your daughter, I cried so hard because it was all the thing I felt when I loss my son, Floyd back in 2009. but I could never put it in words. It the hardest thing that I have every went thru and still do. He was my only child. But Thank God I have my husband and his two son and five grandson. I had four brother and now I'm the only one left. I also know how you felt. Thank you for putting it in wrote. I have a hard time doing it. I'm printed it off and well keep it to read again. Always Thelma
Added by Thelma J. Stockmaster-Sca... on Nov 06, 2013 7:02 AM
D. Singleton Shell
Your token
I happened by the memorial for Marcie Reynolds and saw the old car token you left one year ago today. I love it and will use it on my great-grandparents memorial when I have time.

Do you remember me writing about your words describing your pain? You're so right, I'm experiencing all of that now, but thankfully not because of losing a child. I copied it to my documents because I wanted to remind myself that someone else understands. Thanks again.

Gabby's KY friend,
Darla
Added by D. Singleton Shell on May 10, 2013 10:14 AM
Pat Pitcher
Sorrow
Dear Shirley--beautifully said. Honest and real and true. God Bless you and grace you with the strength and determination to 'continue'--you're right: 'it ain't easy.' My best. Pat
Added by Pat Pitcher on Jan 24, 2013 4:52 PM
Cherryl Winget Gist
Peace
I know the feeling! May I borrow your shovel?
Jeff's moma
Added by Cherryl Winget Gist on Sep 18, 2012 12:39 PM
ME
thinking of you and yours
Hi I have prayed for some peace and joy in your life. God Bless you and yours tc Margie
Added by ME on Sep 08, 2012 6:07 AM
cherie jerrolds
Dear Shirley
I am sure that the pain and suffering you have felt these years has been absolutely terrible. But know that one day you will be with Rhonda again! She is looking down on you and does not want you to be angry. She wants you to remember all the great memories you made together. I love you cousin, you are a very strong woman! And Rhonda was a very lucky girl to have you as her mom..
Much Love,
Cherie
Added by cherie jerrolds on Jun 18, 2012 3:28 PM
Linda Doyle Bow Ash of Kentucky USA
Lost a son
I also know what you feel. i lost my son in 1997 at the age of 34. He left behind my only grand child at the age of two and half. he's been gone now for 15 years and I miss him so. But God has so helped me keep my peace.
Sorry about your daughter and all your losses. i lost my mother at 21. She was 48. Lost a sister in 2006. So know others know your pain.
As everyone says it's not expected to out live your children. I have a son left and my grandson.Thank God for them. love and prayers to you.
Added by Linda Doyle Bow Ash of Ke... on Apr 13, 2012 2:17 AM
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