|Barry Waterfield (#47525109)|
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|I live in England. Not too far from London. I found this site by accident after a television broadcast featuring the crimes of John Gacy in America.I was once a professional musician working mainly in the theatre. Now I am becoming tired and old. I have posted tributes to Robert Piest and Gregory Godzik ( Gacy Victims ) sometimes under my own name and sometimes anonymously.I post anonymously when I want people to think more on a concept connected with the deceased than the person themselves. I have also paid tribute to Michael Llewellyn Davis of Peter Pan fame, Charles Dickens and Charles Kingsley. I am interested in the Esoteric and in the mystery that seems to surround our passing from this earth. In the 'What might have been' factor.I will reply to all mail.|
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|Messages left for Barry Waterfiel... (23)||[Leave Message]|
|Guy ********||RE: John Gacy's Nephew|
You may have noticed that there is a pattern shared between uncle and nephew of cowardly preying on the young, vulnerable and inexperienced. Nephew, like his uncle, exhibits a total lack of empathy and remorse. They both demonstrate the extreme narcissism of the typical psychopath. Also, nephew, like his uncle, paints himself as the victim. They have both presented themselves as lacking and bemused of the basic social sensibilities common to the average nine year old.
Gacy's method of operation (m.o.) wasn't always by way of magician's ruse... As is well known, Gacy would also boldly lure his victims in varied ways (often at gunpoint) off the street and cowardly subdue them with chloroform once inside his car to where they'd awaken at his house in bondage.
I understand about death by ligature, thank you.
Rob, throughout his brief years, had only known the good and very best in life. He was/is such a good soul. He only knew love, support, friendship and loving, gentle parental guidance. There was nothing of his experience in life that could have prepared him for the great reality shock of a John Gacy.
With few exceptions did Gacy release his victims, perhaps once or twice. Rob wasn't street smart capable of keeping a cool exterior through such a situation. Frankly, few people could remain composed, except, perhaps, only a fellow psychopath. With some measure of black humor, I might suggest that justice and society might well have been served if Gacy had unwittingly abducted a fellow murderous psychopath to where they would simultaneously execute each other. ...A twofer so to speak!
If Gacy had released Rob, I'm sure Rob would have reported it to family and other authorities. regardless of whether Gacy would have released or not, this was/would have been the final straw. In Rob's situation, Gacy was sunk either way. When you consider the various possibilities, Gacy might well have stood a better chance had he released Rob.
Rob's Spirituality - Perhaps Rob's unspoken Spirituality serves as the best example. Rob lead by example. He daily demonstrated goodness, kindness, generosity, decency, grace, dignity, integrity, friendship, acceptance, honor, honesty, humility, enthusiasm, optimism, love and peacefulness. The list goes on with all good things!
Rob daily demonstrated the Spiritual saying: "The light in me, sees the light in you." Rob saw the light in everyone. The brilliant light that Rob exuded was warm, inviting and spiritually engaging. He was a most magnetic young man. But for the one exception, everyone was drawn to him in love and friendship. In that sense, I must say that Rob did speak to me (and everyone) about his Spirituality...simply by virtue of being his wonderful, beautiful self.
Barry, I enjoyed viewing your site. It's very nice and quite impressive. My leaving Chicago may come suddenly or gradually depending how the spirit moves me. I shuttle between Chicago, Southern California & Arizona, and after a lifetime in my native city I have come to prefer the warmer climbs of the beautiful, wide open West. I've wanted to live there since the enthused and tender age of seven. Age seven is commonly referred to as "The Age of Reason". My reason now in my 50's is (above all) Spiritual!
I have been to Italy, France and elsewhere in Europe, but not to England. There is a possibility of a London visit someday. I have a younger cousin (we are related through a great-grandfather on my mother's side) who lived and worked in London for several years. She loved London and the British people. She now lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest city of Seattle with her husband and three year old son.
I must say that I have been enjoying our correspondence and welcome its continuation through this medium.
Barry, if we don't speak sooner, may you and your loved ones enjoy a happy and peaceful Easter.
|Guy ********||John Gacy's Nephew|
I have a moment before proceeding with the day's activities. Here is something that might interest you. Google: Raymond Kasper, John Wayne Gacy Nephew.
|Guy ********||RE: Time Earned Wisdom|
I've just read your 'correction date of birth'. I was sure you'd soon notice. My father died 17 years ago in 1997. If he were here with us, he'd be going on 90 years of age. My father was a World War II veteran who served in the Air Force and was stationed in Shanghai, China while operating in the Pacific Theater. My mother is still with us and is in her 80's.
You wrote so very well at such an early hour of the morning and with such lucidness!
You asked if Rob would have been inclined to forcibly defend himself had his hands been free... I had other friends (more 'street smart' than Rob) of that period whom I'm absolutely certain (whether cuffed or not) would have reacted swiftly and aggressively to defend themselves.
I have no doubt that if Gacy had attacked Rob while his hands were still free, (not cuffed) the situation/scenario (psychologically and otherwise) would have been very different for Rob. I'm sure that Rob would have been able to keep his bearings and would have done the natural thing to act in his own defense. After all, Rob was an athlete and gymnast (as was I). I was frequently his wrestling partner in gym class. I knew his mentality (its weaknesses and strengths) and his ability for strategic maneuverability, and I know what a great powerhouse of physical strength he was.
Note: Gacy was a pusillanimous puddin' who would never have had the balls to attack his victims without first cuffing them by way of magician's ruse and then chloroforming them into submission.
Rob's Spiritual Inclinations:
Rob made no pronouncements to me regarding any particular spiritual views.
Barry, you are correct. The time difference between us is six hours. I currently live in my native Chicago (but not for too much longer) where as of this moment I feel the need for sleep. So, I shall say Goodnight to myself and say Good Morning to you with a wish that you shall enjoy a great and wonderful day.
|Guy ********||RE: Imagining the past|
Your insights and comments are greatly appreciated. Your description/perception of Rob's predicament in his final moments aptly speaks to his youth and inexperience. "Time earned wisdom"; how well we understand!
Though Rob was still in his adolescence and lacking in time earned wisdom, he was well ahead of most of his peers in development. His solid, stand-up character, exceptional self-discipline and advanced mental/emotional maturity was certainly that befitting a young man well on his way to breaking away from boyhood.
Twenty years ago, there was a two part (made for TV) movie about Rob and the Gacy case. I recall that this production briefly featured a portrayal of Rob. I recall that it presented Rob rather boyishly (which was presumptuous, but understandable). I could also spot where the creators of this production took some creative license with the story's key points and the portrayal of Gacy. The truth is, Gacy was not nearly as rugged and macho as actor Brian Dennehy's portrayal of him. But it was all done for needed affect and gravity. Now, I wonder about a recent production by Warner Brothers (the WB) that people around the world have been speaking about. I haven't seen it nor have I been able to find it anywhere. So, I don't know how Rob was portrayed. I'm curious as to the level of its accuracy. I'm not being prejudicial, but I will simply state that such productions are not capable of capturing the true essence of the publicly unknown private citizen it attempts to portray. Philosophically speaking, in the end (accurate or not) it makes no difference... Just curious.
I want to note that I was eleven months older than Rob. I started my school years one year late (hence I was in classes w/Rob for six years) and graduated high school six months early-- nearly in keeping with what would have been my proper graduation year. I was born 21st of April 1962 and will mark my 52nd year this next Monday. ...And I will mark my 19,000th day in this world on the 29th of April. Note: the 111 in three of my four email addresses denotes the 111th day of the year--the 21st of April.
Barry, I was amused to read that you are inclined to think of me and Rob always as boys. Were you born in March of 1951? Based on my parents age, I or any one of my siblings/potential siblings could have been born between the years 1947 to 1972. If you were a teen in the '60s (though significant) that's not that great a difference between us-- especially when a person gets into the 'over 50' category. It sure is a difference from when I was 'under 40'. Physically, I'm as healthy and strong as ever. People (when they meet me) think that I'm in my mid to late 30s, but the difference internally and as to what matters in life when we get to this stage of life is (from my perspective and experience) far different and better than ever. What do you think?
I've entered into a great phase of life where I have become awestruck with wonder and amazement at the astounding ways in which how EASILY our directed consciousness can manifest and orchestrate our reality. Much joy comes of this. It's unfortunate with all the suffering in the world that so few people in the world actually speak of joy or experience it.
|Guy ********||RE: What sort of boy|
I hope this day finds you well and in good spirits. I'm glad to finally reply to your questions about Rob.
You are correct when you assume that Rob was compassionate. Rob was always a gentleman and very thoughtful and considerate of other's sensibilities. In addition to being very academically bright, he was very emotionally intelligent and had great emotional depth. You could freely talk to Rob about anything at all and always expect a constructive answer and keen insight. With that, Rob could have a most edifying effect upon anyone seeking his confidence. Rob had a healthy balance between heart and head which allowed him to have a lot of emotional restraint when it came to intellectual pursuits, and a lot of empathy and compassion when it came to matters of the heart. He really had a warm heart and a cool head. Rob never lost his temper or used foul language. Rob was a very easy, affable, approachable, live and let live kind of guy. He was descent and down to earth. Regardless of race or social background, he treated everyone with respect. He reasoned and intuited his way through life. His temperament was ideally suited to leadership and diplomacy. When you consider what I've said so far, you can understand why it is I refer to Rob as a young man and not a boy. Though just a Sophomore in High School, Rob truly was at the intellectual and emotional level of an above average college student. I can't emphasize enough just how disciplined and responsible a young man Rob was! Furthermore, as disciplined and serious as Rob could be, he could also be light-hearted and funny. He had a great sense of humor and would often tell a story or joke while he flashed his signature smile with a knowing look in his eyes. I remember a science project we worked on together. When it came time to present the project in front of the class, Rob opened the subject with some warm-hearted levity before seriously proceeding with every tantalizing detail of the project's design and function. Though Rob always had a remarkable presence, he was not intrusive or overbearing. He could be as unassuming as he was assertive. I remember how Rob would choose his words carefully while sometimes holding the corners of his mouth tight as he spoke. Such mannerisms were part of his way of adding emphasis as he focused the class's attention on the intricacies of the water filtration plant we designed. The invention was so good and Rob so animated in his presentation that he firmly held the class's interest from start to finish. Along with the technical angles of the project, we even made several funny references to the creative process involved in that project. Rob was intensely focused on his education. Anyone observing him would clearly get the sense that he was a very solid young man on a mission to have not only a good, productive life, but a great life of adventure. Rob truly treated his daily life and his life's trajectory like it was a mission. He was ambitious and he knew that it was through discipline and hard work that he would be able to do those things in life that motivated and inspired him most. He knew that in order to reach the stars (figuratively and literally) and get the most out of his life, (realize his dreams) he would have to invest everything of himself into life. Rob was accustomed to success... as he had a history of reaching his goals. He was psyched and enthused in a most delightful, happy way. Rob was not a rebel. He was a very independent and determined guy. His parents were very loving and supportive. I'm sure that Rob had proven himself worthy of his parents trust and confidence through his consistently good record of mature and responsible conduct. Surely, his parents realized that he was very discerning, had excellent judgement and was quite capable of making good, level-headed decisions for himself. Barry, you are correct when you refer to Rob as adventurous, energetic and enthusiastic. Rob was quite athletic and was involved in many sports. He was a very talented hockey player and was a valued team member in his league. Rob's physical constitution was every bit the complement and equal of his academic prowess. Rob had a continuous pattern when after fulfilling all of his obligations as a student, (often to excess and always to excellence) he would have a need to get away and balance himself with extensive sporting activities. He had a particular fondness for excursions in the great outdoors-- citing that it was essential for clearing his mind and recharging his senses. Communing quietly with God, nature and himself, Rob always returned with a renewed and profound sense of self and purpose. Rob knew himself-- he knew what he wanted. Rob, knowing his own potential, and with his generous spirit, would openly and confidently convey his hopes for everyone to realize their dreams by doing their best. When I consider his academic credentials, his stable temperament, his good, solid character and his athletic/gymnastic abilities, I know that he truly was ideally suited to a career as an astronaut and astro-physicist. It surely seemed his destiny. I have no doubt that we would have realized his dreams! Thinking this and knowing how much Rob loved his freedom, he would have made a wonderful and most adventuresome space cowboy! Also, by intuition and otherwise, I know in my heart and have no doubt that Rob had all the makings of becoming a fine husband and a most loving, mentoring father! Rob, by virtue of being himself, had the love, respect, loyalty and friendship of everyone who knew him. He loved life and life loved him back. He had a wonderful life! Rob may not have had a lot of years to his life here, but he most certainly had a lot of life in his years. In his final moments, he suffered (and later also his family) an earthly tragedy whereby others would not be made to suffer. He was the candle that lit the darkness. Naturally at first, most everyone was shocked at his passing, but ultimately nobody was surprised that it was Rob, a young man of high, Godly order and goodness who would be that candle lighting the way out of the darkness of one broken man's chaos and evil. The record of history surrounding the events of Rob's earthly life and passing shall remain unchanged, fixed and earthbound, but Rob--such as he is NOW--is forever happily and joyfully done with it! Of that I am certain. Barry, I could say so much more, but it is getting late here. I hope this answers some of your questions and concerns. You are welcome to write to me anytime.
|Guy ********||RE: What sort of boy|
I will be happy to write about Rob in detail when my current schedule gives way to a quiet period when I can devote a deep and mindful consideration to his memory and character.
|Guy ********||RE: Gacy|
As you can imagine, every excellent point that you made had decades past worked their way through my mind and every fiber of my being.
The best way for me to present the experience of my encounter with Gacy was naturally from the perspective of the 14 year old that I was at the time of that encounter.
I'm very moved by your insights and perspective of the case, let alone the kind and humane sentiments that you have so well been expressing for Rob.
In answer to your question regarding Rob's German Shepherds (Alsatians); they were not from my mother's breeding. Rob's dogs were very bright, wonderful, loyal companions, but in terms of their confirmation, they were not up to the very high German standards of the working/show dogs that my mother bred. Rob's dogs were probably breed-mixed somewhere in their lineage and likely were not pedigreed. My mom's dogs were very select and had some prestige in the international breeder community. My mother's official kennel name was: Hargae. The name was a combination of my father's name: Harry (Harold) and my mother's name Gaetana.
Incidentally, we moved from Des Plaines to an area better suited to raising this large breed... a quiet place with a lot of acreage where Schutzhund training and other dog related events could be held. Also, it was great exercise for the dogs in all four seasons. It was a place where they would not create a disturbance to a close-knit suburban community such as Des Plaines. As our neighbors would sometimes complain about their barking. My mother retired from breeding 20 years ago and is even now sometimes consulted for her insight and expertise by former colleagues. My mother enjoys her peace and quiet now.
I will follow through with that information that would allow you to tour neighborhood Des Plaines at the next opportunity.
|Guy ********||RE: Trancedance|
I lived within one kilometer (south) of Nisson Pharmacy. In late August 1976, less than two weeks before the start of the school season, I walked the distance from my house to the pharmacy with the intention of buying needed school supplies. I recall the day was sunny, hot and humid. I am going to try to intelligibly describe this instantaneous event as best I can. As I was entering the building through the front door (I see this very clearly in my mind's eye, timelessly) it happened so fast that I didn't have time to notice that a man was walking out until we literally bumped into each other. After the sudden impact of our bodies, I took notice of a very stocky man. I had never seen him before but within that instant, I was immediately overcome by a most depressive sense of dread. It was as if a dark pall had descended upon me. I was overwhelmed with a pure sense that I had been menaced and violated. This, in spite of the fact that the man (whom I would later identify as John Gacy) presented himself with an upbeat and cheerful demeanor. He smiled at me and excused himself for the intrusion. I said nothing to him as I walked through the doorway. I remember very clearly that I felt extreme rage as I walked back to the east wall of the building where the school supplies were stocked. I kept mentally repeating to myself these exact words: 'that man is a sicko', 'he has a sick mind', 'he's a bad man', over and over and over again. I was 14 years old. I was absolutely certain as to the foul nature of the man's character! I now understand that the anger (rage) that I felt upon this encounter was actually born out of a primal fear. If you understand anything about the evolutionary order of Human emotions, you know that by that order, fear is the emotion immediately preceding anger. Therefore, much of our anger (depending on the situation) is actually rooted in fear. I was young and inexperienced, but very intuitively orientated. For a long time after Rob's passing, I agonized and struggled to understand how a brilliant young man such as Rob did not sooner detect that Gacy was troubled and harboring ulterior motives; particularly because Gacy had sent up some very obvious red flares with the probing nature of his conversation to Rob in the car. I've come a long way (light years) since then. I now know that it is the works of an all-knowing, Conscious, Divine, Purpose-Driven Universe---before, during and after the fact... Rob was not a pawn, (the Universal consciousness identified him) he was/is what I consider to be a Spiritually Evolved participant who sacrificially saw his way through to end suffering. It is my profound sense that Rob's family knows this at a very deep level of wordless awareness.
|Guy ********||RE: Transcendence.|
Rob and I attended three schools together beginning in 1972. They were Orchard Place Elementary on Maple Street, Iroquois Junior High on Touhy Avenue (it's now called Iroquois Community School) and Maine West High School on Wolf Road. I later graduated from another High School.
Rob's visitations to me (twice on the same day) were possible because of my gift for psychic communication/receptivity as well as the fact that I loved him for the good and beautiful Soul that I knew him to be.
I don't know if Rob's Family has had any communication with Rob. I do know that Rob was very close to his family and loved them more than anything in life and they he. I have no doubt that Rob's Mom holds his memory most dearly. By love and Universal 'Law' their connection is thoroughly in tact. Rob's sister has stated that they think of Rob every day. Rob's Mom is a very gentle, soft-spoken woman who has kept her grief and Love private and dignified. Furthermore, when Rob's brother Dr. Kenneth Piest was ill with a rare form of Leukemia, Mrs. Piest (along with her daughter/Rob's sister) placed herself at the heart and center of the drive to find a suitable bone marrow donor to save Ken. I met Mrs. Piest at the drive when I gave my blood to be tested for a possible match. Mrs. Piest was a most gentle, lovable and sweet lady. I can't adequately describe what I felt when I saw her. When I later tried to describe how I felt about meeting Mrs. Piest to my own mother, I broke down and cried so hard that I couldn't speak. (right in the middle of a grocery store) I'm healed now.
Barry, your sense of destiny is well placed. In this purpose driven Universe there simply are no accidents. There is "something" on the other side of that "mist" and that "something" is a Conscious Soul (Rob) and an all-knowing Divinity.
Visitations take several forms: Three dimensional Visual, Auditory, Telepathic and sometimes Tactile. The visual visitations are sometimes clear. Much of the time they appear as pieces of images. I'm at a point now where I see striking, other worldly imagery on a weekly basis during everyday activities. I have been thoroughly tested by neurologists and do not suffer any brain illnesses or any temporal lobe epilepsy. The fact is--in addition to being naturally Spiritually inclined--that after a lifetime of Spiritual hard labor I have brought these abilities to a good level of development. However, infinity is a long reach for all of us and I'm sure that I have just barely scratched the surface. Physicists now say that there are many realities/dimensions in parallel and/or layered upon each other. I remember listening to one Physicist (City University of New York's Michio Kaku) say that "there are probably dinosaurs walking through your living room right now." As Science itself is as much an orthodox belief system as religion, physicists historically don't publicly attribute anything Spiritual to their theories/ideas. Scientists, though officially objective in their observations, are also frequently (historically) full of ego, hubris and hypocrisy due to a bias of/for professional orthodoxy.
Barry, If U like, I can give information that will allow U to tour the Des Plaines neighborhood I once lived in---starting from the house I shared with my parents, three sisters and several German Shepherd Dogs (My mother raised and bred the breed professionally). It was west of where Rob lived and less than a kilometer from the Nisson Pharmacy where (in late Summer 1976) I had a brief but psychically revealing encounter with John Gacy and where Rob would later work.
|Guy ********||RE: Trancendance/Visitation|
When I said that I didn't know Rob's family, I meant that I could not comfortably communicate the experience I had with Rob's visitation. The difficult and traumatic circumstances (to say the least) surrounding Rob's passing would not permit such communication. After so many years passed and so many of us went our separate ways, it was probably best to keep quiet about my experience. I always hoped that maybe Rob was able to communicate to his family and assure them that he was all right. Whatever the case, I know that Rob's family members are devout people of faith (Catholic) and that their faith and church (among other spiritual channels) have been a great comfort and inspiration to them. I know that Rob came to me on that 12th of December because I was probably the only open channel; the only safe harbor that was open to him after his horrendous Calvary. Equally, it was our strong Spiritual bond, our mutual understanding and Quantum Entangled Spirits that made his visitation possible. So called quantum entanglement is strongest between people who know each other directly, but there are connections to people we may not have ever met. I have had some experience with that. For me these experiences are quite ordinary and should be considered as such. My experiences extend far beyond this temporary, earthly life and the visitation of departing Souls is to be considered only the beginning of a much greater, vaster Spiritual Universe and Life. I am passionate but peaceful about this and care deeply that I share as best I can (in any given moment)with everyone. Words too often fail; I say this for a multitude of reasons. I am at a wonderful time in my life where I am undergoing mayor changes... often on a daily basis. I don't think in words as much anymore. It's at a point that I have to create a wordless way to adjust to the changes. Under such a condition, questions of personal identity come into play. I'm reminded of the Buddhist tradition of moment by moment asking the question "who am I?" Ultimately, our personal identity develops into the Trans-Personal Realm of Awareness beyond ego. Consciousness and Spiritual Evolution goes as follows: pre-rational - rational - trans-rational / pre-personal - personal - trans-personal. Frankly, my life has always been complex and over the course of a lifetime, I have built a high-powered mental engine to see me through to a deeper spiritual understanding that has increasingly lead to a life of simplicity with greater conscience/awareness. On a more earthly note, expressing myself through this medium has been a kind of catharsis for that last vestige of the difficult 'past' within me and a small way to commune with others who care about Rob. With that said, I hope to inspire others (in some way) not to gloomily dwell in the darkness of grief, but to come out into the Brilliant Light of New Spiritual Awakenings---New Spiritual Possibilities. Barry, I thank U for your considerate correspondence. God Bless. ~ Guy
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